Saturday, April 20, 2002

Wedding Day Blues

Leave messages here or else!!.

“Live Your Life Be Free
Open up your heart and you will see”

It would seem I am going to write a long post – you have been warned!!

Sam it would seem has a post at his uni radio playing gay Clive from Maidstone on its soap opera. Forgive me if I sound slightly put off by this but… what is he up to?! If we replace the word Clive with Jason… well I think you get my drift. I think I will have to talk to him about acting, imagination and the use of fiction. So I am now the basis for a radio soap opera and I am on someones desktop background (in the background of said picture anyway). Is this fame?

So the much advertised wedding party arrived on Friday, with much complaining from them. “Oh aren’t the beds hard?” “Aren’t the beds short?” “The toilets backing up”. I mean really, they are paying half price here!!

Anyway after the bride to be informed them yesterday morning to stop being evil, they quietened down as the stressful organisation started. As I am in charge of reception I was left in charge of presents and flowers until they were almost literally coming out of my ears!!

The wedding was at 2p.m. so obviously they didn’t leave until 1:55p.m. despite the fact that the church is in Cheriton (where I live which is 5 minutes drive or twenty minutes walk away). Anyway the whole thing was chaotic!! I am never marrying!! (Well as it is currently illegal I don’t really have that choice now do I!!)

I am sick to death of heterosexual propaganda being pushed on me everywhere I go, be it a wedding, the tv, magazines, peoples expectations, etc. When will I get strong, positive homosexual role models? When will a gay couple be shown in an advert without any fuss, as if it weren’t odd? When will it be possible for me to be able to write my feeling truthfully without my step dad basically calling them sick?

I am not evil, or sick, or unnatural. I don’t want to hurt anyone. So why do people throw stones at me when I hold hands with my boyfriends? Why do they call me queer in the street? Why do they want to hurt me (even if they can’t as I’m 6’8 and could kick their arse if I wanted)?

Then I have Laura who texted me today. Then seemed to blame me for Sam’s comments on his blog and other problems as well. Am I a bad person? I know I am not nice to everyone but I try to be nice to some but… they aren’t nice to me. My own fault I’m sure.

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