Thursday, May 02, 2002

Jubilee Blues

The Queen's Jubilee truely is underway, with everyone talking about the propagandist documentary on the BBC last night. It made me feel like going outside, wearing a large Union Jack, standing to attention and singing "God Save the Queen". *shiver*

Local elections today. The BNP are posing a serious challenge in the north.

"somebody save me,
don't care how you do,
save, save, come on,
I've been waiting for you"
Smallville Theme

I am not at all happy right now. But finally I can tell you the cause of my recurrent depressions. After much analysis I can reveal it is my family who make me hate myself. But I shan't dwell on it. Instead I shall formulate an evil plan at this site. 'Tis very funny. And Smallville was on last night. Definetly getting an ever more unhealthy obsession with the star.

Jason's Silly List 4 - Silly Words I use Too Often

1) Kerazy (pronounced ke-RA-zy)
2) Fabtastic (when fantastic simply isn't good enough!!)
3) Chuckalious (is to funny what delicious is to tasty)
4) 'Tis ("it is")
5) Anyhow (no not anyhow as it reads but any-hew a phrase I picked up from Stephen)
6) Salute (why I use this word is currently under investigation)
7) Bonsoir (I really need to stop saying it especially in the morning!!)

My Evil Plan
Your objective is simple: World Domination.

Your motive is a little bit more complex: Power

Stage One
To begin your plan, you must first clone a pope. This will cause the world to realize something is wrong, baffled by your arrival. Who is this really bad guy? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good as an intelligence transferred into a computer?

Stage Two
Next, you must seize control of United Nations. This will all be done from a floating fortress, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory. Upon seeing this, the world will give up, as countless hordes of evil clowns hasten to do your every bidding.

Stage Three
Finally, you must unleash your needlessly big weather machine, bringing about a 1984 police state. Your name shall become synonymous with the spice girls, and no man will ever again dare steal your woman. Everyone will bow before your mind-boggling insanity, and the world will have no choice but to give you control of the planet.

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