I Should Be Making Things Easy On Myself

Ok so it wasn't a very long hiatus.... I mean how long do you think I can go without blogging?? And I feel much better. What have I been up to?

Well on Friday I had a really rather good evaluation where my trainer Jackie told me that I was rather good. :o) And I recieved a hundred and ninety squids worth of holiday pay from Eurotunnel so it was a bumper payday (have been internet shopping already!)

Saturday I got a taxi down to Newington (a very small village), and circumnavigated around that via a little used footpath to get to Peene (an even smaller village) where I had a rather bizarre renedevous with The Leader (of the LD) by a broken bridge, I gave him the leaflets I couldn't deliver and he gave me the paper to deliver. Then I wandered the three miles into town to buy aXm and went home.

Thinking I had a few hours before I had to go out I settled in for a rest. Then the door bell rung. It was Frank, Melly-Mels boyfriend who I haven't seen since just after she died. So I had three hours of chatting to him. I discovered Mum and Tony plan to get married on her birthday in Lympne castle. Yuck!

I went out, got vaguely drunk with John and Zoe, and spent night secretly staring at camp bloke on table just across from us. Muhahaha.... he was cute.

Today have done... nothing.... but get my head together and think about things. I realised I may have been seeing my relationship with Stephen a lot differently to how he saw it. And anyhow I am only 19 and I have my whole life ahead of me to have a whole hoard of other boyfriends.
(mmmm..... ) So am a lot more cheerful and upbeat today.

Ben texted me today and invited me shopping in London on Saturday with him and Becky. But I can't go am visiting Smelly-Mels' grave.... see what sacrifices I am making for you missus!!! Tut!! May I just make it clear to Melly.... I am sacrificing going to London just after pay day with Ben so I can go and pay my respects to a piece of ground and her rotting corpse. That is how much I love her.