PoetX.... your wish is my command

Jae The Fairy Godmother of Half Naked Men Doth Grant A Readers Wish To See His Royal Highness Prince William In A Little Less Clothing...




If that's not enough to keep you royalist then there's no hope for ya!

Prince William... in an army uniform.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/4363568.stm

 

PHWOAH! That is all I can say about that news story...

Jae Takes A Step Back

*Click on the rent my blog link... you'll make me very happy*

Remember when you first discovered the internet? Do you remember the years before Google (BG)? I'd forgotten... but thought I'd go look up some old friends to see how they are doing.

I was at school the first time I went on the web and the first page I ever saw was shown to me by Pete (you popped my internet cherry!). That site is one of the strangest on the web. Reverse Speech is an interesting if slightly weird site about reversing peoples speech to reveal hidden messages (urban myth? NEVER!).

Another golden oldie still going strong is Total Obscurity. HILARIOUS! I actually feel bad I'd forgtten about it. It's that good!

Then there was the first blog I ever found, Mister Alan. I found it after I had been blogging for ages. Strange but true. I started blogging after reading about it in the Guardian and didn't even get into reading others blogs for about 6 months. Through commenting there I discovered Karen who became a firm favourite.

Oooo.. and back to school again... who remembers the Death Clock? Why was everyone so interested in it? Not an IT lesson went by without it...

Don't Panic

Last night, while I was half watching Matthew Kelly in Cold Blood (he was scary!!!!) and half updating my code on my blog to the Rent My Blog function from Blogexplosion (see on the right... please click the thumbnail picture, that way I won't make you buy me a Christmas present [offer not valid to people I have met in the real world!]), I managed to delete my blog code. :o( So lots of links are missing. Don't worry the link to your page will be back up tonight, as you can I see I did some last night but it was late and I have been so tired the last few weeks. 

 

The train to work today was... interesting.It arrived a minute early and I got on. It was crowded but not so bad as to be unbearable. We stopped at Deptford and began to speed up for London Bridge. Then we stopped. For half an hour. Then we moved... and then stopped just outside the station. For another ten minutes. A few feet away from me some bloke threw up in a plastic bag, causing commotion as certain passengers fled the scene. Then we started and stopped and started and stopped. By the time we made it to Waterloo East I was ready to scream... my back hurt as train carriages aren't tall enough for me (one of the many problems of living here on Midget World), it smelt of sick and some child had decided to sit down and lean against my leg. GRRRRRRR.... Stressful.

 

Looking ahead... I shall redesign this blog by 15th November 2005. I want spangles and sparkles and a proper sized title graphic. I am looking into doing the occassional podcast.

 

In the real world probably gonna try to have a quiet weekend, although Sam America wants me to go to The Church on Sunday (a very dodgy Aussie bar). After that... who knows! Jim's going away to America for a little while in a couple of weeks... who wants to keep me company by coming with me to pubs, bars and stuff? Elliot and John will you be in London???

 

 

Jae Says... Leave Cruising Alone

Hmph. Well Kev left a comment about it and Jim pointed out an article in the Evening Standard about it (by Peter Tatchell no less) so it must be a pressing topic... cruising is back on the agenda. I thought people were finally over their obsession with the fact gay men have sex, but the recent murder of 24-year-old bar manager Jody Dobrowski has brought the subject up. That's not to say he was cruising, but that's the suggestion some are making.

Cruising. Cruising has been part of gay life for a long time. Before the bars, before Stonewall, before Boy George and before AIDS there was cruising. Now just because something has a long history doesn't make it right. But it certainly means we should treat it with a little respect when considering it's merits and pitfalls.

Even where cruising occurs in public (hey there platform number 10 at the Gare Du Nord!) most straight people don't even know it's happening. So it's not like it's affecting anyone else. As long as no one gets their cock out where others might see it (THE SHOCK! THAT MAN HAS A PENIS!) then I can't see why cruising is even an issue. As a liberal (dear Americans to me liberal means libertarian not far left!) I firmly believe that grown ups should be allowed to do as they please. Sure it might upset those worry warts who sit at home and care about what other people are getting up to without them, but then again I'd support anything that upsets them.

So before I launch into a tirade against intefering bastards can someone come up with a convincing argument (please note convincing means it doesn't mention religion and is not "I just don't like it" extended over a paragraph or five [BANNING SOMETHING BECAUSE YOU DON'T LIKE IT IS SOMETHING I DON'T LIKE AND SHOULD BE BANNED*]) against cruising. Why should two people you don't know NOT meet up for random sex (and let's say it's safe sex... if they have unsafe sex I can see a certain argument regarding public health being allowed)?

*except people who wear blazers and jeans together, they should all be banned...

Jae Is Not Cut Out For Customer Service

Now when I say that I don't mean I can't do it, I mean I am sick and tired of it. Dealing with ungrateful, and in some cases undeserving people and their rather insignificant problems isn't my idea of fun.

 

I want to do something which is 1) very, very gay 2) involves the web and 3) involves minimal work for lots of money. Any gay porn companies need a marketing manager? Anyone want to pay me to write this blog? Or at least buy me a present (oh go on, no ones bought me a present from here in ages!)? 

 

Somebody save me from this 9 - 5 existence!!!

Jae's Guide To Using A Train

Before leaving for the station ensure you have your money/tickets with you. It may be helpful to know where you are going, why not check National Rail to find out.

Once at the station head towards the ticket machines, or the booths. If you have a ticket/Oyster card head to the platform. When the queue is large it can be helpful to pay by cash rather than selfishly using a card to pay and holding everyone up. As you move away don't block others when staring stupidly at the screen showing which platform to go to. Move to the side.

When heading towards a platform... KNOW YOUR SPEED. If you are slow, or just stupid, walk close to the side (signs will tell you which side to stick to, but as a rule keep to the left) that way more speedy people can get past you. Is that your mobile phone ringing? Learn the skill of answering and walking... it's far better than stopping and blocking the way of everyone else. Did you know it's possible to talk and walk? Weird. Bear this in mind if transferring between trains as well.

Trains have doors. These can be opened usually by pressing a button (some do have handles). These buttons are generally round, and surrounded by flashing lights when operable. Apply pressure using a digit (these are located on your hand). VOILA! The door will open. Isn't that better than standing there like a lemon blocking the way of the guy behind you?

Allow people off the train first. Strangely walking into people moving in the other direction will impede your progress. Allowing them to pass will mean everyone gets on the train quicker. If a seat is free take it, if not move to the centre or the ends of the carriage as far as you can go. I know it's tempting to stand near the door, however for some reason no one has yet developed the ability to walk through you.

If the train is particularly busy, and you are getting to know your fellow passengers rather too well, keep your quips to yourself. I'm sure "It's like a tin of sardines in here" was funny in your head, but it's not going to cheer anyone else. Reading a newspaper in this situation is also not advisable, unless you do wish to be punched in the face.

Don't stare and when talking with someone else try to avoid involving the whole carriage in your conversation... talk at a normal level, your ears still work on a train.

When leaving the train do so quickly and don't stop as soon as your feet touch the platform, often other people will wish to get off the train behind you. Why not move away from the train before you ponder your new surroundings.

Have your tickets ready... barriers are so much easier to get past with a ticket ready, it's really dumb to wait till you are at the barriers before finding that ticket.

Leave the station... you have reached your destination.

What's Gaying On?

So let's have a look... and start with something good!

An article from the Houston Chronicle. It's always reassuring to see that there ar still some people in the world ready to say that codifying anti-gay laws is equivalent to racial discrimination and religious discrimination. Americans need to understand that they stand on the brink of something... they can either continue down the path they are heading on which will most certainly lead to further militarism and discord, or they can reaffirm their belief in liberty and let their gay and lesbian fellow citizens be free (even if you don't like the idea of homosexuality).

Hatred tends to lead to things like homophobic violence. Sadly it appears to have happened yet again. And if any of you read that and think "Well he was on Clapham Common" please leave this blog immediately. It's weird, but you never hear of gangs of gay men attacking and killing straight men, despite a lot of us finding the idea of straight sex DISGUSTING. Strange that, huh?

We need to keep pushing... just a little more and we shall finally make it... We are lucky that we have some people behind us, see here. Equality isn't that far away!!

Homecoming Queen

Headed to Westenhanger yesterday with Jim to see the family. They have a new cat called Tinkerbell who is way too soppy. I liberated my CD collection from the room formerly known as my room (now David's room, yes Uncle David, he who was married not two months ago has sought asylum at Folks Wood Way).

Went to Kalala for dinner with Mum, Tony, Beth and George, David and his three daughters Rachel, Margaret and Alice plus Rachel's boyfriend Tian, and Zoe, Ray and John. After dinner headed to Chambers with the latter three and Jim and met up with Laura for drinks and chat. Cool!



Jae's brief return to Folkestone gets 14 people to a dinner. Never knew I was popular!



John, Zoe and Ray, thanks for coming to see me guys!



The service was very fast, amazing Tony and Mum.



Aren't they cute???




Unlike George, my brother.

 
 

Laura! One of the original hardc0re 3!

Fame At Last!

As is becoming standard, I put my iPod on as I shut the front door behind me and headed off to work. I switched on Bad Weeds San Francisco and wandered towards the station. Guess who got a mention? Little old moi! I sent an email in and it was read out, and Corkey "dedicated" the show to me. So sweet! Listen to it the show rocks.

 

Since I started working for an internet based company I have been quite shocked by how few people understand the concept of internet search. They seem to think that by typing words into the search box on Google or Yahoo the exact website they are looking for will appear. Looking for a contact number for a company? Hell just type in that company's name, click the first link that comes up, don't read anything about the website you have gone to and just phone the first number you see. I must take at least 10 calls a day where someone thinks we are some other company simply because we are the top result for that company's name on Google. How can they think this when our name is in inch high letters on the top of the page???? How can people not understand a basic search? No one has ever taught me how to use Google, so why on Earth do these people need me to tell them that Google searchs, while marvellous, aren't perfect? Grr.... rant over.

 

I went out on a work night out last night to Mish Mash in Clapham. Not a bad bar, with a drinkable Mojito and a gorgeous Long Island Ice Tea. YUM! Had a good time, it's just a shame I always feel the need to leave early to catch the train... when I'm totally ok financially I shall stay late, cos then I can get a taxi without worrying about the cost. Till then I'll be the boring sod.

 

Wandered to Clapham Junction listening to my iPod. I must of walked down every road around the station, peering through locked gates onto platforms filled with passengers for about 10 minutes before I found the way in. That was the way brightly lit with lights, and huge signs with the BR symbol on them, that I had walked past when I first caught sight of the platforms. I'm a dullard sometimes.

 

I'll be in Folkestone this weekend, if you are about and haven't heard from me call/text 07709 149 325 so we can arrang meeting times/places/people. See ya Sunday night. Unless I see something interesting to write about tonight...

Things I Like

I want an iPod! Ok my iPod nano is awesome but now I'm into podcasts I wanna watch video podcasts... *sulks* Go on, last Halloween I got a normal iPod as a present... how about it Dear Constant Reader?? No??? *really sulks* And the BBC says...

Daily Hot Guys. A blog title that I think speaks for itself. Inside Stephen is nicely designed (reminds me I need to do some work on this site!!) and interesting.

Sparkletack I love this podcast, an brilliant insight into the history of the Bay Area.

Lindsay works with me.

A Shitty Day

Don't you hate shitty days? The kind of days when things happen that piss you off but there is nothing you could have done about them?

First off work was boring, and there was lots of it to do, and everyone seemed a little snappy today. Which was stressing me out. Then I caught the train home and stood next to a lovely (thankfully defaced) sticker from the National Front "Homosexuality Causes AIDS The Queer Disease".

Yes a little homophobia is always gonna put a smile on my face as I plot the painfully slow deaths of each member of the NF.

Then I got home, dropped my iPod off and decided to go get some money out before the bank decided I couldn't have anymore. Joy! The cash machine allowed me money! Wandered back home, and just as I got to the bottom of my street two boys stopped me and attempted to corner me, and then proceeded to try to rob me. Guys... please. I'm twice your height. Did you really think it was gonna succeed? What was going through your head? I'm not stupid! Kicked them away and proceeded home thinking "What a shitty day".

Yahoo - Jae Actually Likes Something You've Done

I'll admit it, I'm a Google boy. I know, it ain't cool to like Google anymore. But I do. I have nothing to hide, as it says in my byline, what is the point of being discreet? So Google me up baby!

On the other hand Yahoo lost it's charm for me years ago. It just got too... busy. The site was horrible and cluttered. So I stopped using it. Bt their latest beta site is great: Yahoo Podcasts. Businessweek has a good story on it. As I'm just starting to get into Podcasts so this is darn useful me. Come on Google, Podcasts are so in! Why not connect Google Talk up to Blogger for hours of podcasting fun! :o)

Hate Smoking, Not The Smoker

Let me get something off my chest. I hate smoking. I hate coming home from a night out smelling of smoke. I think that public smoking is a selfish and incredibly rude habit. Tell me something Dear Constant Reader, why do people think they have the right to smoke around me? Because Dear Reader... they do. I hate to say it but if obnoxious people have the right to stop me in the street just to say "God you are tall aren't you?" and if I have the right to get stupidly drunk and irritate others then why don't smokers have the right to be selfish and rude??

The idea of banning smoking is so illiberal it hurts. I loved the fact in San Francisco I could go out and come home still smelling fresh. But is that worth someone else losing part of their freedom? No it's not. This Government has done quite a few good things, especially for us moxes. But it has down far more bad things... plans for ID cards, ASBOs, a massive increase in police powers and caused a panic in the face of a terrorist threat from inside our country (despite the fact this country has a long history of fighting internal terrorism and hasn't had to panic before...). Banning smoking is just another sign of this behemoth of a Government taking our freedoms away "for our own good".

If people didn't like people smoking near them they should turn round and tell them that. If your friends smoke around you without taking your feelings into account dump them!! We don't need more legislation... we just need to be a bit more proactive.

Boyfunk - A Shameless Plug!

A good majority of my readers have come here looking for porn. Don't be shy, it's nothing to be ashamed of. If you like the Brent Corrigan look, why not head over to Boyfunk. Brilliant site with loads of lovely lads.

And that way you can stop sending me emails requesting porn pics! It's a win/win situation!

Wallace and Gromit: Curse of the Were-Rabbit

Just been to see Wallace and Gromit: Curse of the Were-Rabbit. It was typical Wallace and Gromit fare, not awesome but enjoyable in it's way. If you've seen any Wallace and Gromit before then you will not be shocked by the plot. But the kids loved it, so really good to keep the little horrors quiet for a while... Animation can't be faulted.

USA - Jae's Perspective

So I'm just back from my first trip to the United States, and have to say it's been interesting.

As a reader of newspapers and magazines like the Economist I knew that there was a lot of poverty in the US. But this still didn't prepare me for just how obvious it was in San Francisco. There wasn't even an attempt to hide how many homeless people there are, let alone deal with the problem. Coming from London, which has plenty of homeless people, I was still completely disgusted. But from reading the San Francisco Chronicle it looks like the Mayor is at least taking things seriously.

The Americans I met were more friendly, generous and polite than I had expected (and yes I had heard they were amazingly friendly). Sure as a British person it was very off putting to have cashiers smile at you, and to see people greet strangers on public transport. But it was quite warming nevertheless.

California is just as beautiful as I hoped. America in general impressed me. Other than the abject poverty I saw, the only other complaint I have is the severe lack of cute men. Maybe I was looking in the wrong places, but eye candy was seriously wanting.

And finally... I can't believe men really do wear cowboy hats without any sort of irony. SCARY! ;op

I Wanna Go

AH! I am so fat. My stomach has doubled in size while I've been in America. This is not an exaggeration. I blame far too many hotcakes. No wonder Americans have a reputation for being overweight. Their food is just too scrummy.

So from tomorrow I am going on a diet. Fruit, veg and lots of water. This time last year I lost loads of weight but have put it all on thanks to being in a relationship. Time to get back in control of my diet. NO MORE LUNCHTIMES DOWN THE CAFE/PUB.

I'm missing San Francisco. The weather here is RUBBISH!

Ok... time for a site update I think... when Jim wakes up (he's still on Pacific time) I shall grab the lovely new title design he's made for me and put it on the site (It's a homage to "Wish you were here" the best travel programme ever!) and I may even do a little redesign. Shocking or what... haven't had my own design in years. Also... I have been getting quite into podcasts so there will be a new links section for them... first up the funniest and most interesting podcast I've found so far... "Bad Weeds San Francisco" Check 'em out. Corkey is hilarious!

Pictures.... The Neverending Story

I'm kinda bored of posting these...



Mmm... Muir Beach.



California... home to a race of small druids???



What a name...



Pride!



Is this one of Jim in the Japanese tea garden? I can't remember... I'm losing track of what I posted. God, how many pictures did we take... this one is number 170...



That's the last of them... Thank God...

Pictures Part 2

When near bears ensure you suspend the food from a wire at height.



Jim likes driving in his car



This is known as the Golden Gate Bridge. I was disappointed to find it wasn't made of gold... ;op



Jae still doesn't quite believe he was in a car on the Golden Gate Bridge.



Muir Woods were gorgeous but I think they are best left to your imagination... only so many amatuer pics of huge trees one can take...



It's a deer! I promise!!



Jim... you are soooo smooth!



Jae Wants To Live Here.



This is Jae Kay reporting from the Pacific coast of California



You sexy thing you!!!

The Pictures!!! - part One

Within moments of arriving in San Francisco Jae makes new midget friends...Aww....



Pier 39 seals...



Jae has a bit of a thing for the Transamerica pyramid...




Ooo... that rocks famous, I think...



Drama!




Jae get's shown his new hotel room...



Jae struggles to make new friends in the exercise yard.... strangely that all changed when he got to the showers.



Jim does take lovely photos...



Castro Street is a little bit poofy



Jim spent hours taking this photo while I stood staring in terror into the tunnel surrounded by giant sharks...



This was only a little one...



I love what you've done with your hair...



The Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence... nuff said!

Farewell San Francisco

Yesterday we headed up to Castro for our last American breakfast at Orphan Andy's. Hotcakes... how I shall miss you. Anyone know anywhere in London that does hotcakes? Bought the Spartacus guide at A Different Light. Love that book, but it's always sold out in London. :o)

Walked up to the panhandle and Golden Gate Park via Comix Experience. The park was a disappointment even if the Japanese tea garden was lovely and the botanical gardens primitive plants were enchanting!

Got a cab back to Castro and had a few (many) drinks at Harveys, and a fajita at La Tortilla . The most massive fajita I have ever seen in fact!! :o)

Rushed back so Jim could buy an air soft handgun.

Off to airport in 2 hours. :o( Goodbye San Francisco, it's been a blast!

It's A Jungle Out There

Monday morning. Got up early, and picked up aMustang convertible from the Hertz rental place around the block from us. Looked gorgeous, and we headed out of San Francisco and over the Golden Gate Bridge with the wind in my hair. Just needed a headscarf and we could have been Thelma and Louise. Was soooo cool. Went to Muir Woods which is the home of one of the last strands of original Redwood growth. Those trees sure are tall. Some appeared taller than Canary Wharf. Is Canary Wharf taller than 200 feet? Amazing. As we headed back to the car park along a hillside trail we cameupon two wild deer grazing right next to the path. :o) Lovely! Drove down from the woods to Muir Beach which is very pretty and we got our first (and possibly only!) glimpse of the Pacific Ocean proper. Magnificent.

Deciding not to head back to San Francisco we drove further north getting lost once or twice, but eventually ending up in Napa Valley which is Californias wine country. I have never seen so many vineyards in my life!! It was very beautiful.

Since almost day dot of my relationship with Jim, he has talked about Stag Leaps wine. So we spent some time looking for it, and eventually found the ranch. Did somewine tasting and settled on some wine to buy, which was quite lovely.

Headed back to San Francisco regretting leaving the top down only slightly as it grew chillier. Chillier by California standards anyway. It fell below 20 celsius! We have been blessed with great weather I have to say! Seeing some of the outstanding Californian countryside was brilliant.

Had a meal at Lou's Blue Bar, tried some Buffalo Wings (HOT!) didn't finish as portions were too big!!! Jim has taking a bit of a shining to some "air soft"guns we saw in a Spy Shop (no cameras allowed... it's a secret!!), and has spent the hours since then planning on getting them through customs (they are legal but they look and feel like a real gun!)

Todays our last full day... so better go have another adventure!

San Fran Is Freaking

Saturday night and we got cab to the Chinatown Gate (after the streetcar we were on stopped as the driver refused to go any further...). Wandered up and down in search of a restaurant, until we settled on the Empress of China. Good food, nice views over San Francisco and some of the nicest Asian waiter arse I've ever seen.

Sunday. Had breakfast at the International House of Pancakes. YUM! Then went to the Aquarium of the Bay. Really good. Slightly worried by the six foot Sevengill shark!!! Wandered in search of Buffalo Wings,but gave up and caught the streetcar to Powell and our usual line F to the Castro. Yesterday was the day of the Castro Street Fair!!! A bit like Soho Pride, only far better. Got cruised within five minutes as had wandered too far from Jim. Stayed far closer after that. Had a tarot reading with a gay psychic who told me that Jim and I were about to go through a rough patch while moving his hand ever further up my leg. Cruised and sexually abused by a gay psychic within mere moments. Yeah, sounds like a gay event!!

Headed back to Powell where... Jim bought me an iPod Nano!!!!!!! :o)

Quiet night really, most of which was spent searching for a restaurant with power! Got a McDonalds as was hungry at which point fishermens wharf's power returned!! GRRR....

Reporting Live From San Francisco - Jason At The Argonaut

Friday morning, and we were awake so early!! We left the hotel and decided to walk to the Castro. Up Hyde we wandered, which is one long hill! We walked and we walked, until we made it to the Mission. Deciding we were too hungry to go, we stopped at It's Toms Diner and had a proper American breakfast. Ok. I concede, maple syrup does go with bacon and hot cakes are better than our flimsy pancakes. I apologise to every American who I've told otherwise.

As we had to go to Alcatraz and were now running late, we braved a MUNI streetcar. Easy to use, but Americans treat public transport more as an informal gathering than a way of getting anywhere. Loud, chatty... nice but quite disconcerting for a Brit! Got back in time for our ferry. Headed over to Alcatraz which was AWESOME! Really felt the atmosphere, and the history, there. Walking round the exercise yard with the mist rolling over us was actually rather spooky.

Got the ferry back, dropped our stuff off at the hotel (the Argonaut!). We caught the streetcar straight to the Castro. The huge pride flag flying in the sky signalled that we had arrived. Pride flags flew everywhere. It's truely a brilliant place. I wish Soho was half as good. And it felt so bitchfree. Porn was sold openly unlike here where it's hidden in dark corners (even Virgin on Market Street had gay porn there for all to see!). Had drinks at Harveys, Moby Dick and Badlands. Then we went to Orphan Andys for a nice meal. Caught a streetcar to Powell and took a cable car to the hotel. COOL!

Today went up to Market via a cable car, this time with me clinging on the side for dear life. Jim is soooo evil sometimes. ;o) Headed to Orphan Andys for breakfast,had some drinks at Harveys then went shopping near Powell. I've got new clothes! Cheap too!!! :o) Also got Monk season 2. Great!!!

What Happened Next...

Tuesday 27 September. Someone throws themselves under a train at New Cross thus delaying Jae by two hours. Grr... selfish suicidals... do it on your own time!

Wednesday. Went on a work night out to Soho, starting at the Alphabet Bar. It was okay. If it had been in Folkestone it's attempt at looking like someones attic would have been cool. But not in Soho thank you. We moved on to some red bar starting with R where Champagne was drunk and Vince and Bonnie gave me some San Francisco tips.

Nineish we went to the Blues Bar, where I tried to pimp off some Americans, Bonnie and Peter had a conker fight (COOL!) and I said goodbye to Kiwi Sam, who I shall not see for a while. He was cool. And his replacement looks nothing like Colin Farrell (name of Andrea).

Walked Paul down to his bus. Thing I love about Soho is that it's surrounded by roads I know so no matter how drunk/lost I get I can always appear knowledgeable by leading people to their destinations. By a very roundabout route. :o)

Thursday. The day without end. Got up at stupidaclock,and headed for Heathrow, where we discovered Virgin Atlantic wanted to charge me50quid because I'm so tall! Laughed in their face. Anyway when I got on the plane found they had movedus anyway to bulkhead seats. So they lied to try and get someone to pay for something they have to do anyway. BASTARDS! Flight was eleven long hours but thanks to entertainment system (Spaced, Will and Grace, League of Gentlemen Apocalypse, Tarnation, Little Britain,and MissCongeniality 2!) helped us through. And the service waslovely and a million meals were served so Virgin, I forgive thee!!!

San Francisco. Wow! It's America! There are Americans,and big cars, and big roads, and big everything!! We got to the Hotel at 4pm local time,but that's about midnight by my body clock, so we... went out again!!! Our hotel is lovely, the room is HUGE!I'm sure the bathrooms in another time zone. Fishermens Wharf is asexpected. Tacky but fun. Had some clam chowder at Boudins, where I was renamed Tayson. Was accosted by Japanese tourists who wanted their picture taken with me. I was in a good mood,but made themusemy camera as well (pics of me with them will follow!!!). Jim got had for a $20 shoe shine on his trainers. FOOL! Saw the seals off Pier 39 and enjoyed the views to Alcatraz and the Golden Gate Bridge.

Thursday the 29th of September 2005 was 32 hours long. PHEW! It's 2am here, but I'mwide awake... ah!Fucked up body clock.

And this space bar... messed up!!!

Jae's Last Post (Probably!) Before He Takes Over The United States

Please note US Immigration agents this in no way suggests I wish to overthrow the United States Government. And I am not a Communist *throws his Soviet star with Hammer and Sickle onto floor and remembers not to take a copy of the Morning Star with him on the plane*. Oh and I'm only a little bit gay (Jae please do not take Gay Times or Attitude with you!). And don't be cheeky. And don't mention the war (1812) or the Empire. And let's leave Bush bashing to the breeders. And abortion is so out of bounds as a topic of discussion. Ooo... and hey global warming ain't gonna disappear in a week, so leave it out!

Phew just a little bit of ettiquette to remember.... ah and with my current experience of Americans here at work also do not make any jokes that could be offensive to anyone in anyway. Americans seem way too fragile, bless their cotton socks. Oh and take clean socks!!!

Hmm... ok I think I've covered everything... WAIT... no kicking SUVs...

God, this travelling to America is very stressful, and I haven't even started packing yet!

Jae Kay Is Away

Do Yourself A Favour

Hey!

Do you live in the UK? Do you want 24 meg broadband? Do you want one month free? Then go visit my mates Pauls new blog at BeThere24!!! He'll sort you out, and no he's not paying me!!!

Jae Is Going To San Francisco

Last night Sam  (http://www.livejournal.com/~srachel11) came over for a Chinese and a few drinks and got the honour of meeting Jim. Twas a nice evening, even if I had to avoid coming out to the Chinese lady ("where your brother? he brother or friend?"). Had a few pints at Richard 1st, probably our last out in the garden for the year if the weathers anything to go by!

 

Two days till I go to San Francisco!!! I am soooooooo excited now.  It'll be good just to have a break from work, I'm mean I've had to have over 4 weeks in a row here! Slavery! ;op

Jae Goes To Reuters Big Day

Oh yes Jim's work opened up their offices to friends and family so us and the kids dropped by...






Anyone know who's kids these are?



Jim realises it's a free bar behind him...



Step away from the rabbit...




Hmm... we lost some children and gained a gang of weirdos.



AH!



Ian's on TV!!!

Jae Goes Wilde

Oscar Wilde wrote one of my favourite books "The Picture of Dorian Gray"

And so I'm pleased to give you this link for hours of enjoyment. I wish I could write even half as well as he could.

Jae Will Never Understand Certain Things

Gay-priest ban won't end sexual abuses, some argue. Well it's good to know there are SOME people in the Catholic church with brains.

It has been a long time coming but that's the most insulting news headline I've ever seen. You mean banning gay men won't stop sex abuse???? Oh my God! Are you trying to tell us that being gay isn't the same as being a sexual predator??? Hold the front page!

And the editor of this news site is paid real money? For real news, from a sane source, go to the BBC's version.

Honestly guys... have you no eyes to see? Most abuse occurs within families. Most families consist of (dare I say it) hetrosexuals or closet cases. You do the math. Out and proud gay men? They're more interested in fucking their brains out down the local in the dark room than abusing some pre pubescent.

What the Catholic church really needs to do is ban priests. Let the Holy Spirit do the leg work.

Legacy

The remaining Holocaust survivors are starting to die. Wiesenthal funeral held in Israel

It's hard to imagine that not that far from where I am right now murder on the most disgusting scale occured, during the lifetime of my Nan. That's a blink of an eye in real terms. It is our duty never to forget World War 2 and all it's horrors, even after the last witness has died.

If we forget... then there will be hell to pay.

Jae's Campaign For Fabtastic Queers

written 25/09/05

Last night I sat reading Gay Times and yet another article about the commercial exploitation of the GLBT community and the homogenisation of the scene, when I could take it no longer. What has happened to us?

Back in 1998 when I was taking my first tentative steps out of the closet I remember the gay bars of Canterbury being full of interesting and exciting people. There were goths, freaks, trannies, lesbians (God forbid!), dirty old men and people best described (in the nicest possible way) as "what the fuck are they?". It was fun.

Now it's 2005. Take your pick of any gay bar or club in London. From Action through to XXL everyone is totally dull. Everyone looks the same whether they are all bears, or all twinks or the sad boring bastards wearing jeans AND a blazer in GAY. Conformity is the key. I haven't seen a pre op transexual in years, nor anyone I would think of as a fabulous freak.

What happened to subversion, or even simply being different to the breeders? We dress like straight people, talk like them and even follow the crowd like them. Whether it's rich tossers wearing jeans AND blazer (it's a pet peeve) to council trash chav scum we copy them!!!

I wander through the blogverse and find the same things happening, gay men who have been normalised. BORING!

So I want to know if anyone else feels like I do? Are we just going to sit back and become like everyone else? Whatever happens... we must stop the evil jeans AND blazer squad before it's too late. Let's do something about it!

Let's get back our immaturity, our insecurity, our tradegies! Being gay ain't just about shagging men!! As Judy Garland (praise be!) once sang...

Be a clown,
Be a clown,
All the world loves a clown
Act the fool, play the calf
And you'll always have the last laugh,
Wear the cap and the bells
And you'll rate with all the great swells,
If you become a doctor, folks'll face you with dread,
If you become a dentist, they'll be glad when you're dead,
You'll get a bigger hand if you can stand on your head.
Be a clown, be a clown, be a clown!

Jae Loves A Nice Start To The Morning

Email post so links may not work, will tidy up later...

A hug from Jim, a nice peaceful non busy commute to work and then a trip in an elevator with the cutest guy I've seen in a long, long time (Jim not included) ...

 

Short black hair, a baseball cap tilted sideways (not a chav one but a proper American baseball one), slim, wearing a short sleeve t-shirt over a long sleeve, with knee length denim shorts and dark trainers. Mmm... that skater boi look is sooooo good.

 

Monk got a mention in G2 (http://www.guardian.co.uk/g2/story/0,,1576728,00.html) today. Love that show, people please watch it, it's back on BBC 2 October 1st, afternoon time. It's BRILLIANT!

 

Maureen Lipman in G2 annoyed me (http://www.guardian.co.uk/g2/story/0,,1576480,00.html) and I shall respond to her in a long moany post this weekend which I'm sure you will all look forward to. ;op If you think customer servants are bad... wait till you meet the customers!

 

 

Jae Goes To The Northern Down Under Again

Went back to Acton last night via the slowest tube train in history. JOY! Had a lovely chicken caesar salad at Sam's before heading out with her, Lindsey and Lindsey's Aussie boyfriend Matt to a pub called the Mill Hill. Pretty cool evening, and Lindsey... Matt is CUTE! Marry him immediately! :o)

 

Plans ahead.. probably doing something tomorrow night, Wednesday night shall be heading for a work night out in Soho to the Alphabet Bar, Thursday I shall be in San Francisco, and Monday Sam is probably coming to Greenwich for a reciprocal meal... All fun... See I'm starting to get a life!!! WOW!!!

 

 

Jae Is BORED

I fancy doing something random. Random but cheap and that doesn't interrupt work. Ideas on a postcard (or in a comment) please!

 

News still slow. Which is a good thing meaning we are only operating at a normal level of badness as opposed to worse than normal (which considering how bad things normally are is really crappy).

 

We'll forget about the whole Basra thing. Hey we are there to support our Iraqi friends remember, by bulldozing their police stations with tanks... SAS guys please answer me this... why were you stopped in the first place? 

 

 

 

I'd Like To Thank You All!

Hello Dear Constant Reader and those just searching for porn!

 

Thanks for all the lovely comments and emails of late. The emails are fascinating... am I to believe that I have so many Dear Constant Readers who love my blog, and read it all the time and just happen to want to see certain pictures?

 

Cos guys, please don't send me butt kissing emails, I hate sycophants. If you want something you only need to ask nicely, and not talk to me like I'm a child. I'm not dissing the lovely emails. Just be honest with me, and I'll be a lot happier doing what you ask.

 

:o)

 

I am getting very excited about my trip to San Francisco. Just a little more than a week to go... ...

 

Antipodean Town

Yesterday I escaped the house for an evening in Acton with Sam R from work. Twas fairly cool, her house is MASSIVE! Had dinner at the local Spoons (that's like my 99th spoons ;op) and then went to the Redback which is a dodgy but pretty cool bar for those from the southern hemisphere. Everyone in Acton seems to be Aussie, Kiwi, or from small s south Africa. They served snakebite blacks and had live rock music... BRILLIANT!

 

Went back to Sam's for some Strongbow Super (cheap but tasty!!!) 

 

I think I'm becoming obsessed with Randy Orton the WWE wrestling star... WWE (when it was WWF) was more only source of male flesh before we got the internet... It should get an award for services to Gay Youth. 

 

 

Inconsistency

Ok so Iran wants to go nuclear. I agree any country going nuclear is pretty bad. But please will someone explain to me why Iran shouldn't be allowed nuclear weapons yet other countries should be allowed to have them?

What's our stance really saying? That nuclear weapons are bad in general? No it's sadly not. What it is saying is we don't want you to have them because we don't like you.

I'm not against a nuclear deterrant. I believe it's an important part of our defense. But we cannot hope to keep it, and not allow proliferation. We either give them up, or we put up with increased risk. We can't be two faced about this!

Brent Corrigan - The Saga Continues

Go see this forun at juicygoo.com for the most up to date info on the whole thing. Thanks to Jim for finding it!

I would post my thoughts on it but then this post would probably get deleted by the evil Google police for being too controversial... and those of you with brains can probably work out where I stand in the whole debate.

Jae Wouldn't Mind Being Pinned By This One

Wrestlers. Don't you just love them?

Jae Wants To Be In San Francisco NOW

I really, really do!

Last night wandered into town along the Albert Embankment. Met Jim at Charing Cross and had a few drinks in Retro, headed home and had another drink in the George and Dragon (I feel so dirty!).

I'm putting weight on again. Grr... bodily functions are bloody annoying!!!!!!!!!!!

News is slow, nothing even remotely interesting. So...

My favourite porn star may be underage!. Well that is under 18, not under 16. So really it's only going to shock the illiberals. I've decided for the time being to not post any more naked men, so for your enjoyment I present a clothed Brent Corrigan...

Jae's Life Trundles Ever Onwards

Hard to believe I've been writing in this thing for over 4 years!! Here I am living in Greenwich with a lovely boyfriend, working in London in a job paying good money for what it is, and I am enjoying life. Certainly not where I imagined myself all those years ago. When I was really young I thought I'd end up bobbing along the Amazon in search of some weird and wonderful creatures as an ecologist/zoologist/cryptozoologist. Then I thought one day I'd spend my time helping others through life's troubles as a social worker or a carer.

 

Instead I'm in customer service. That's why I love life, always unpredictable, and interesting. Who knows what I'll be doing in 4 years time (when I'll be 26! OMG!)

 

Hmm.. so Wednesday Jim was out with Paul so I thought I'd have a nice relaxing evening to myself. I settled down in my dressing gown with Space Race and some Diet Coke. Half nine a drunk Jim fell through the door, threw some clothes at me and forced me to go down to the George and Dragon with him (yeah right, beer drinking requires no coercion). There was no stripper, just one barmaid and David (the guy whose phone number I managed to get down the Rose and Crown much to Jim's continued annoyance). Then headed to the Chinese where Jim gave his phone number to the owner (SLUT!). It was actually so she can phone him when she next makes rice cakes... :o) I love that little Chinese, lovely food.

 

Am starting to get quite excited about my upcoming trip to San Francisco... can't wait!!!!!!!!!! :o)

 

 

 

 

Jae's Awful Spelling

My grammar and spelling reach new heights of awful each and every day. I can tell this is the case because of the incredible amount of searches that come to my site badly spelt. Are you looking for pitures? cabury world? I'm sure I can't help you! And what on Earth is a scapper? Appears there may be some in India though if one of my visitors is to be trusted.

 

Note to self get some English lessons!

 

 

 

Things Jae Loves About The Noughties

1) being able to pause TV shows. How cool is that??? Right now I should be watching the Space Race but fancied doing this instead... so I paused it. Still freaks me out in the best possible way!
2) Google. Where would I be without Google Maps, Gmail or the new BlogSearch? Not to mention Google News
3) Internet Porn
4) iPod's
5) Blogging
6) Reality TV
7) The death of reality TV
8) Cheap flights
9) Smaller newspapers
10) The beginning of the end of homophobia in Britain.

Run Tinkerbell Run!

Yesterday was work night out as yet another person is leaving. Was cool, although the ubiqitous frisbee did appear and although I did start to have a throw my managers shouts of "Run Tinkerbell Run" soon put me off. Had some drinks in the park outside the Lavendar before the alcoholics among us moved onto Picos for a meal, which was rather nice. Chicken Peri Peri... yum!

 

I have to say I may well have been a little bit drunk.

 

My Powerbooks charger is broke, and I am having to update via email from work at the moment as obviously I only realised it was broke after my Mac switched itself off. Joy. Am bidding on another one but it's very annoying!  As I am updating via email the quality of presentation shall be even worse than normal. Be warned!

 

In the news... stupid people cause problems at some petrol stations... it really is true; civilisation is only ever three missed meals away from anarchy.

 

People who have sent me emails... I will deal with them as soon as possible!

Jae and Jim Go Mystical

Sunday, the kids were away early and we headed out to get some mushrooms for breakfast. Jim sidetracked us by disappearing into the Coach and Horses for a pint, first customers! Roll on 24 hour opening! Then we won't have to wait till eleven!

 

Jim then booked himself in for a Tarot reading at one of the market stools, while I went and purchased some stones for spellcasting at the local magix shop. Bought so many I got a free pouch! 

 

Jim's Tarot reading was funny, while he was being sorted out I was forced to chat with the readers psychic friend. Ah... she was a card. Jim's reading was fairly standard, my particular favourite part was "Relationship wise you have got what you dreamed of". :o)

 

As a pagan, I believe you should self divine, not rely upon someone else, but getting a Tarot reading is fun, and at only £5.00 it was the same price as my tiny piece of Italian nougat... so BARGAIN! 

 

The new Guardian was released today... I like it. Since I moved to London I've had to switch to reading the bland Independent, which is less anti social to read on a packed commuter train, but less fun than my beloved Graniuad. Loving the new style, just hope people stop referring to it as Berliner as it's a tad annoying, although I don't quite know why. Now all they need is to get Julie Burchill back on a Saturday, and the Editor magazine on a Friday and I shall be happy as Larry.

 

 

 

 

Just Another Day In Northern Ireland

Why do we allow it to continue? Northern Ireland may as well be on the other side of the world. There you can be chucked out of your house by your neighbours just for saying the wrong thing. There rule of law is whatever someone decides it to be, hmm... the police can deal with him, and we'll deal with this thief. A knee capping should do it.

What is it all about? I used to, being the leftie liberal I am, think it was the nasty Protestants against Catholics who were just fighting for equal rights and treatment. But it isn't. It's tribal warfare between evermore disgusting and grotesque groups of people. With a whole bunch of innocents caught in the middle. Ethnic minorities, homosexuals, and law abiding families trying to survive in a province filled with stupid hatred and brain numbing poverty. It's time the British and Irish Governments did something about the constant rioting, fighting and law breaking... that's up to them obviously to work out a long term solution. May I suggest why not shut both sides churchs till they are grown up enough to call themselves Christian. Cruel but hey they might get together to fight a common foe. (Please note am not serious about that, just think it'd be rather amusing... in a warped way).

Oh and exile Dr Paisley to the South Sandwich Islands. It's the only way. I am serious about that.

Jae Wants To Know Why You Want To Marry!

Kevin McDaid and Mark Feehily have gotten engaged. Hmm... I know I bang on about this subject a lot, but why do gay men want to get married?? What is it about marriage, a decrepit and pointless institution now that it's original purpose has been distorted by the idea of "romantic love", that makes people want to keep on getting hitched?

But I wish everyone who gets married well, and I will fight for your rights to be dull (well not fight, quietly support you from this armchair here). Against such adverseries as the "Verminator" who wants to veto California's gay marriage bill.

So why do you want to get married, or why do you agree with me?

I'm just going to have to face it. I'll never understand peoples desire to marry (here's a crazy idea, why not just tell the other person you love them, and spend the money on something nice), and I'll never understand conservatives.

Elsewhere... should I set up a new blog at www.jaekay.co.uk? A vblog?

Flying Giant Reptiles, Batman!

Oh yeah, did you see this story? Wow! Imagine what having one of those swoop over you would have been like! A 60 foot wingspan, imagine the sound!

Brings into perspective stories of Thunderbirds, midgets compared to these ancient goliaths!

Jae's Glad It's The Weekend

Had a team lunch today which was cool, gave me something to look forward to during the morning anyway! No plans this weekend. Just got back from Richard the 1st... just not in the mood today.

Jae Gets Stuck In A Lift

I hate lifts. I used to be so petrified of them that I wouldn't get on them for even a trip up one level. It all stems from watching some old movie, where a lift falls down it's shaft and smashes it millions of pieces, when I was very young. I still find them a little "uncomfortable".

Today eight of us boarded the lift to our office. Chris pipes up "Wouldn't be funny if the lift broke down?" Two seconds later and it stops. Dead. We spent an hour in there, although my spirits were lifted when we heard a man outside "This is the London Fire Brigade". Ya firemen I thought, and kept thinking till I saw them. DISAPPOINTING! Oh well those thoughts at least kept me from freaking out!!!

Anyway I know the other seven people a whole lot better now!!

Jae Is Censored By Blogger

Good lord! All I did was publish one picture of Kevin McDaid naked and wham bam, the post is deleted as "illegal" content. I don't mind, now it gives me something to moan about for the next few days!!! Little Goody Two Shoes shows his bad side... Cor this makes me feel like a rebel.

That has cheered me up this morning...

The Good News and The Bad News

California, we love you!. Now here's a good example of politicians doing their job and leading the people, as opposed to following them. No offense but our politicians have become such bland and passive arse lickers to keep their jobs that we may as well not bother having elections. Good to see some still have balls of steel!

Shame some others don't have two brain cells to rub together. Homophobes, I am bored and tired of putting up with your shit, who the fuck are you to tell us we can't do what you can do??? Grrr...

And when will some men learn? Women are your equals. Get over it!

And I thought the Bible said give unto Caesar what is Caesars. I think the Council Tax is grossly unfair. But let's vote out Blair, not break the law guys!

Goodbye Multicultural Jae

Over the last year the debate over the merits of multiculturalism has raged without end. I would always have labelled myself a multiculturalist. As a pinko, leftie liberal I believed that everyone should be allowed to live their life as they wanted, and subscribe to whatever culture they wanted to. But my beliefs are based on a very important concept of "And ye harm none do what thou will". That concept is the central tenet of my lifestyle. That is why the concept of community and of family becomes daily more remote and downright dangerous in my estimations. Communities and families control cultural mores, destroying freedom.

Allowing all communities total freedom to live their own "cultures" is wrong. I've come to believe that now. How can I believe that men and women are totally equal, that gay men and women are equal to hetrosexuals, that sexual morals are less important that safe sex, and still support communities that support forced marriage? Or Death to Homosexuals? (Old story but I think it illustrates my point!

So I solemnly promise that I shall not tolerate the intolerant, defend the indefensible, or put up with other liberals disgusting support of hardline Muslims, nor Christians support of their fundamentalist leaders. Time we defended our liberal democracy against those who seek to spread their malicious culture, and undermine our freedoms... even if they are Scottish

Little Shop Of Horror

I have had the theme tune to Little Shop of Horror stuck in my head for the last two days. I just can't seem to shake it. It's very annoying! It's even more annoying because it's the kind of song I feel like breaking out into a dance to, but this would not be too wise a move when on the 08:08 Charing Cross service! :op London commuters are highly territorial, any infringement of their space is met with a very stern look indeed!

 

Went out last night with a few people from work to the Lavendar, played various drinking games and a good time. Why is it, whenever I'm a little worse for wear, there are always delays with the trains going home??? God... I hate waiting at train stations when I'm rat arsed. Never a good thing!

Are you suffering from a Kevin Mcdaid obsession?

If so click click here, sign up and all you are looking for will become clear in the pictures section!

Thanks Tottyworld.

A Quiet Day In...

So Saturday we decided to have a quiet day in. We managed it till about two when we got hungry and went in search of food. Our search took us into town and to the Walkabout near Temple. I forgot football was on, and was momentarily suprised by the huge crowd in the pub. It was cool, but I hate football and there was no chance of food, so after a drink we headed up to the Strand, had a browse through the BBC Shop (a trip down memory lane!!) at Bush House before another drinks at Kudos.

I like Kudos, I think it is quite a cool little bar. I've had a few nice days in that place. Finally food was found in Tokyo diner. I can never understand why that place isn't packed to the rafters, cheap and delicious food served darn quick. Yum! We had dessert at the Haagen Daz restaurant on Leicester Square. Double Yum!

Went shopping in HMV and wandered around the Trocerdero. Had a few drinks in Comptons and GAY. Saw Josh Rafter (saw Brian May on Friday night and Jim was at the gym with Graham Norton on Thursday... go us!) Then we headed to the Theatre Royal Haymarket to see a preview showing of a Few Good Men, with Rob Lowe and John Barrowman (PHWOAR!). Yes that John Barrowman! Captain Jack in Doctor Who... love him. It was very good, and a lot more amusing than I would have imagined. Having not seen the movie, I can judge it on its own merits. Go see it!!!

Then headed home via Burger King.

Jae Goes Out

Wandered to Charing Cross from Vauxhall station, as couldn't be bothered with trains. Was a gorgeous walk along the South Bank.

Went out with Jim to Retro Bar last night, had a few drinks and played loads of quiz games on the machine. Won Nothing. :o)

Had a Pizza Express, then went to the Edge on Soho Square before heading home. Nice to get out and about in town for once.

Thank God For Hurricane Katrina

Christians spend little time in spreading hatred and their appalling biblical knowledge, and understanding is almost laughable.

God hates gay people so much he'll happily destroy the lives of thousands just to stop us having a party.. OR NOT!!!

No wonder I gave up Christianity when I became old enough to understand that most Christians are a little bit scary.

Hurry Give Us Money!!!

Oh yes. I feel bad for the people of New Orleans and the other areas affected by Katrina. I really do. I cannot imagine how awful it must be for those who are trapped without hope of relief.

But I nearly broke something when I heard President Bush asking for relief money from the nations of the world. Erm... hands up to the nation which only begrudingly gave money to the 2004 tsunami? Erm... which nation has just spent loads of money liberating Iraq when they should have been looking for Osama Bin Laden? Which nation is the richest in the world? I have many American friends here in Britain and I feel awful saying this but.... the poor of New Orleans didn't just magic themselves into existence. They are Americas self made problem. It's time America cleared up its mess.

Maybe in the future you will look after the poor, and the unfortunate. Maybe in the future you will not allow a situation in which the most needy are the ones who can't escape oncoming disaster. Maybe in the future you will make sure President Bush isn't on holiday all the bloody time.. it's only 8 years of his fucking life. He can relax all he wants after he's finished!!!! He sent the troops away, and left your homeland unable to respond to disaster.. remember that.