Christmas At The Folks House

So what have I been up to? Not much really. I did do a quiz on the 16th at the pub. I thought the questions were quite easy but alas no one else seemed to agree and the highest scoring team only got just over 30 out of 60. Let's just say: there was heckling, and it wasn't very popular. Oh well...

Plan B is a little better now there's a couple of people there I can talk to but still not the ideal place to be. Perhaps it's only 100 times better than my last job after all :p

For Christmas I got: LOTS! Thanks Zoe and Lee for the book!! Add to that... oh I don't know about 20 more books, and a couple of DVDs and a HAMPER (yes, a HAMPER) of Guylian chocolate and you'd have one very happy Jae. But Jim, as always, has to go and beat everyone else. Not only did he get me the Special Edition of the Love of Siam (including postcards, photos, the soundtrack and a bonus feature of Mario Maurer in the bath...) but he also bought me the wooden Father Christmas toy from the movie!! It was meant to come with the special edition but production problems stopped that happening... so instead Jim went out of his way to find it and very sweet of him too. :D Happy times.

Christmas has been good so far, and I hope yours has been too.

New Years Resolutions??? Hmm... MUST LOSE WEIGHT! Honestly. This time I mean it. You guys simply have to start being meaner with me! Send me hideous amounts of emails calling me fatty or something ;)

And finally after being absent from our televisions for some months I'd forgotten how gorgeous and beautiful a speciman Spartan from Gladiators is so for all us Gladiators fans here we go:



Don't you just want to have his babies?

Majel Barrett Roddenberry Has Passed Away

My self imposed, no laptop enhanced exile from blogging must be briefly ended due to the sad news of Majel Barrett Roddenberry's passing. As a lover of Star Trek it is extremely saddening to hear of her death. She brought so much joy to her roles and she will be greatly missed. Can Star Trek really go on without the voice of the computer???

May She Rest In Peace

It's Christmas Time... Nearly

I can tell because the strange mixture of extreme delight and despair has fallen upon me as is now a Christmas tradition.

I spent the weekend down in Lympne with the parental units and my siblings and had a lovely time. Jim cooked lovely fish cakes, we watched movies and the Christmas tree went up.

But I know I can barely afford Christmas this year and things are going to be really tough. :(

Jim has gone over to Boston for a few days so my mood hasn't been helped by the loneliness.

And work. Leaving my last job was a good move. Finding another job without finding a way to earn money without doing any work at all was a bad move. If it wasn't for the rather awesomely pretty boy (I'm talking AWESOMELY pretty. Think The Sixth Former sort of awesomeness) I saw on the tube today I think I may well have given up and gone home (thankfully he got off at Hammersmith too).

My laptop died yesterday, the hard drive is fried I think, so this will probably be my last post for this year (blogging from work, it's a big no no around here). I don't know when I'll be able to afford a new laptop but it may well be some time indeed (think years rather than months!). Sorry Dear Constant Reader, you'll have to make do without me.

Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!!

So in case I don't see you; good afternoon, good evening and good night.

Eurovision: This Is Serious Business

Graham Norton to be the British Eurovision commentator? Terry Wogan stepping down??? 

After this year's Eurovision, where Terry Wogan showed extremely unsportsmanlike behaviour, I did call for Terry Wogan to step down as commentator. But to replace him with Graham Norton? Is that really necessary? 

Don't get me wrong, I've always had a soft spot for Graham Norton. I grew up loving "So Graham Norton" on Channel 4 with Dolly Parton and that old lady from the audience who kept turning up. All very amusing in a Friday night comedy chat show sort of way. 

But whereas Terry mixed wit, with knowledge and enthusiasm, I feel Graham Norton is likely to mix his "wit" with more "wit" and a lot of cynical sarcasm. Which is exactly the reason I wanted Terry to step down. 

I supposed I should stop worrying and give him a chance but alas, Dear Constant Reader, I feel the time will soon be upon us when Britain withdraws from Eurovision thanks to the badly handled BBC running of the show and British people's cynicism.

Contrasts

Jae's current obsession: ZOMBIES! 

Who's Been Buying Me Stuff???

I went to place another book onto my Amazon wishlist and was shocked at how empty it was. Quickly checking my purchased items I realised someone had gone and bought me almost my entire wishlist!! Jim denies all knowledge and my understanding of the current state of his wallet backs this up so my suspicions rest on my mother until I see proof other wise. Gave me a big smile anyway.

So I've gone and updated my wishlist with all the sequels to what has been bought already... YAY!

Golden Wonder Crisps

You, Dear Constant Reader, remember the happy days when branded Cheese and Onion crisps came in green packs and Salt and Vinegar came in blue packs. All was right with the world back then.

Then one day Golden Wonder disappeared. No it never ceased to exist, Wotsits and others carried it's name on for a time before falling to the sword of the evil empire, Walkers, but their normal flavoured crisps just disappeared from the shelves. The dark age of a topsy turvy world where you never could tell what flavour of crisp you'd get just from the colour of the pack descended upon us.

Jim and I went to Makro yesterday and found Golden Wonder crisps!!!! Yes... and so it came to pass that I did take a green pack and behold it was cheese and onion. And it was good.

Tasty, tasty, tasty! I've not really been a great crisp fan for many years. The flavours were not there for me. Now I realise I simply had grown used to the awesome flavours of Golden Wonder and nothing else could compare. Crisps are good again!

And you know the scary thing... the scary thing is I am not only not being paid for this post, no one even asked me to write it! I know... in this modern day of paid per post blogging I'm really missing a trick.

Go get some Golden Wonder crisps!!

I Is Most Proud

My sister has started a blog

Pah

On Thursday three separate tenants called me "The most helpful person they have ever spoken to" at Plan B. Which is either a sign of just how good I am or a sign of just how awful Plan B's service is. Gave me a nice buzz anyway. 

Other than that... all is quiet on the West Greenwich front. 

The Most Helpfullest

Yes, that is what one tenant called me today. Happy days. :D

Yesterday night was quiz night and the Tail Enders didn't do too badly... we were joint third before a tie breaker question:

In what year was the first manned balloon flight?

Seconds later my answer was submitted. Guess who'd be swotting up on air balloons? Me!!!

1783... mwhahahahaha! Moonlight Investigation has it's plus sides!

P.S. I'm greatly annoyed to discover that the George H W Bush was the 41st President of the United States which that bloody quiz master got wrong and I got right. Grr... with that point we'd have been joint second and with that question would have flown through into second place. ;) God... I'm sounding like one of those sad quizzers who take it way too seriously...

Survivors: Good and Bad

So I watched Survivors last night and when it finished I went to sleep quite happy about what I saw. But having had time to contemplate it I've begun to feel a little disappointed with the show.

Firstly I realised that despite the extended (compared to the original series) scenes of the beginnings of the virus as it spreads around London, those scenes are pretty terrible at relaying any sense of true horror or dread at what is in effect the end of the world. One second things are bad, the next everyone is dead. They may as well have just started with everyone dead and not bothered with the pointless, unexciting lead up. Are we really meant to believe half the population took days to die and then the rest suddenly died while everyone was asleep??

Then we have the acting. Jesus... I was so pleased to see Freema from Doctor Who but then she died leaving us with a bunch of actors who seemed unable to convey any sort of emotion. Do they really think everyone would just wake up one day, find the world dead and within 7 days be able to talk about their friends and family dying without any emotion?? Sure some might be totally shocked but others would be letting some emotion out.

And post apocalyptic Britain so far seems like a dream! Everyone died in their homes or in hospitals or mosques and the roads are practically clear except for the occasionally plot forwarding randomly placed car. In a panic that would follow a pandemic like this most roads would be clogged with cars and as accidents increased it'd only be worst. Where was the chaos? Losing power and water is hardly dramatic or really very important given that by the time the public found out about the end of their world they would have been rioting in the streets. Where were the piles of bodies clogging door ways? The fires out of control? Would Britain really just die out so quietly?

Finally in more storyline based concerns I really don't care for any of the characters. A Muslim preachy school kid, a less than preachy lapsed, nouveux riches Muslim who you just know will be praying within 2 episodes thanks the kid reminding him of Allah being great, a criminal who seems to have thought a bag full of £50 notes might somehow come in useful in a post apocalyptic world, and Abby who is the most dull lead character I've ever seen.

All in all not a great start... roll on episode two. Let's hope there's some improvement!

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!!!

The new Survivors starts tonight!!! 9PM on BBC One. You HAVE to watch it. I don't care about any feeble excuses like "I don't like sci-fi" or "I didn't like the original" or even "I don't live in Britain and can't watch it". Watch it!!

Why am I so determined you watch it? Because the original Survivors was amazing. I mean, it was totally the most awesome programme on telly.

I also have to admit without Survivors I'd never had found I loved Doctor Who. Back in the early nineties Survivors was shown on Sunday mornings before Doctor Who and my laziness kept me on UK Gold after Survivors had finished enabling me to discover the pleasures of travelling with a Time Lord.

So watch it. Or watch out! ;)

Worzel Gummidge Makes Me Smile

Dead Set: Dead Good

I watched the Dead Set today. I had intended to watch it on broadcast but missed the first episode and decided to wait until I could watch it from the start.

For a television series it's pretty darn good with the Big Brother setting actually adding realism (I know, irony!) and making it feel a lot more raw. Davina McCall as a zombie, brilliant! The best parts however were those set outside of the Big Brother house and the ending was somewhat grim and flat. But it certainly had a lot to say about reality television and our society and it was full of zombie's!! So it gets the Jae Seal of Approval.

The Seat Chasers

I really truly cannot stand one part of my commute, of any journey in fact in London; the seat chasers. These hideous creatures jostle, and push as soon as a train begins to slow as it draws up to the platform and by the time the doors are drawing level with them they are craning their necks, getting in everyone's way trying to pick out THE SEAT that is going to get them home in the most comfort. As the doors ping open they are already so excited they are practically bouncing up and down, that's if they have deigned to allow those on the train to get off before they board, (a rare event but not unknown) and then they bundle in through the doors weaving past people as they head towards some distant seat that is the one they crave. They care for no one but themselves and make taking a train somedays a living Hell.

I may have sold my soul and become a member of the rat race but the day I become a seat chaser is the day you are officially allowed to kill me.

Yesterday Plan B had some visitors from another Trust who had come to marvel at the disorganised rabble efficient organisation we had. One of the group came and listened in with one of my Seniors and I just sat their with one thought in my head:

I KNOW YOU

But no matter how hard I tried I couldn't put my finger on it. When he said his name was Malcolm I internally noted that matched my incomplete records, but I was still none the wiser as to who he was with relation to me. I noted the sort of haunted look in his eyes that said "I used to be better than this" and I guessed then he must have been something more important in a past life. I didn't talk to him, it being rude in my opinion to wander up to someone and go "I KNOW YOU" and it was some few hours after he left before I realised who he was. He was the departmental head of my department at TVW. I'd last seen him dressed up as Pudsey bear, as he was chief organiser at the Children In Need call centre I sometimes volunteered at. I remember him being a very jolly man and can only imagine how it must have been for him to have been let go from a job like that and becoming instead a simple manager for a repairs team at some not for profit organisation.

Of course I don't know that he was let go but I also know he was. If you know what I mean.

I'm writing a story at the moment. Haven't written one for so long, God it feels good. :D

The Tube

I always said I'd never get a job where I had to get the Tube to the office. But despite my reservations the District line isn't bad, I can a seat on the way home everytime and often get one on the way to work too. And I sit down, something I don't do on trains out of respect for others, but District line trains have fab individual seats in each carriage meaning I don't inconvenience anyone else with my big legs when I'm sat down.

But you don't half get some weirdos on the tube. A man got on the District line at South Kensington today and stood himself awkwardly between me and another man. He looked up briefly and he had the strangest eyes, they reminded me of a big cat's eyes (black slits on bright yellow, I'm talking weird!) He looked back towards the door and held his face against it. He held on to the door when the train moved off, like he was a adrift at sea and that door was the only thing keeping him afloat. At Gloucester Road he swung off the train (literally swung, keeping one hand on the door even with it open) to let people off before swinging back into place just before the door shut. He repeated this at every station, eliciting more than a few odd looks from everyone else in our part of the carriage, before he swung off ahead of me at Hammersmith and wandered UP the platform beyond the stairs... to nowhere. The platforms ends not far beyond that point...

Just another day on the Tube...

Did I Mention...

...I'm totally hooked on Tom Milsom (thanks Jim!)?



Especially Catsongs II



I demand you buy his album now. I earn nothing off that link, I'm in it for your musical betterment alone.

Jaws II And Reese's Cups...

Why is it that I just love cheesy monster movies (Lake Placid 2 and Shark in Venice excluded... oh who am I kidding... Lake Placid 2 was worth it for the hilariously bad effects. Shark in Venice however is truly the worst movie ever made)?

Jaws II. I love that movie, and I'm watching it as I type (something which always drives Jim crazy... he thinks I can't multi task!). But I've found the movie is even more greatly enhanced when munching on some Reese's Cups Jim's American colleagues have brought over for him me. I'm not talking about those big ones that are available all over the place now. I'm talking about the miniature ones which I love to eat in a typically weirdo Jae fashion (bite the bottom off then savour the thick chocolate top). Mmm..



Work work work. Yesterday I learnt I was officially the best person stats wise in my department. Mwhahahahahaha. But still work is soooo last year and I really, really just want to live the life of a pampered British country gentlemen. *crosses fingers for explosion of Google Ads clicks on other blogs soon*

On Stephen King

One of my strongest memories of my dark teenage years is of sitting in my room depressed and bored listening to the Manic Street Preachers "This Is My Truth Tell Me Yours" when I happened to pick up a copy of The Tommyknockers that had somehow made it's way onto my bookshelf. It's cover was aged and bent and the pages were yellowing and it smelt of "I've been in a box in an attic for years". But I started reading. And I didn't stop reading it until I was finished.

It wasn't my first Stephen King book. It isn't my favourite. But it is the book that changed me from someone who read Stephen King books into someone who loved them. It was from then on that I purchased as many Stephen King books as often as I could afford to. I know what you're thinking, so what? I am not proficient enough with words to express what his writing has meant to me. I don't mean that in the crass "I'm your number one fan" sort of way. But the way he writes and the ideas he expresses have influenced me greatly. The music of Catatonia and the writing of Stephen King acted as a tourniquet to my fractured, depressed mind and helped mold me into the man I am today. From the use of the word "mayhap" to the phrase "Dear Constant Reader", the way my brain speaks (if not how I really speak) is heavily Stephen King reliant. His obvious love of America, Americans and Americana fuelled my own passion for American history and culture. His movie "Maximum Overdrive" helped rekindled the love of rock that my mother had tried so hard to foster (she's off with George to a Motorhead concert next week).

His book It gave me a summer that in the darker days of 1998 I couldn't have myself. Sure it's a book about a homicidal alien creature but it's also a book about childhood, about friendship and about the good within the bad. His book Bag of Bones chilled my spine. I found Desperation under my Mum's bed after she'd put it there to try and put it out of her mind, it had disturbed her so much. I found it deliciously dark. I love The Long Walk, a book I think every one should read once in their lives. The Stand is Stephen King's take on the end of the world, featuring God. It also happens to be my favourite book. Needful Things is a farce of epic proportions that you can't help but like. Misery is too well written for words. Gerald's Game the book I think I'll never finish... I always get half way and then stop reading... The Regulators is strangely alluring, it's surrealism makes it stand out in my memory. 'Salem's Lot and Pet Sematary remind me, in a good way, of rainy days. But there is one book that has stayed with me far more than any others.

The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon it's haunting. The story of a girl lost in the words. It's beautiful, it's well written and unlike many of Stephen King's books it's easily read.

I'll never be the fan who writes a letter to express my thanks, but here on my own little pieces of t'internet I say a big Thank You to the man whose words have been with me as a constant companion for nearly half my life.

Predators

Well after watching Predator and Predator II round my parents house, Jim and I come home to find Alien vs. Predator on the telly! Which means I can print a picture of husband no. 2 without guilt.



The only senior Republican I'd have sex with? You bet your bottom dollar. Until Dolph Lundgren gets elected to Governor of California, make mine Arnie.

Speaking of husband no. 1...



My heart remains forever He-Mans. One day Dolph will realise we got married when I was 5 and will come be my sugar daddy (Jim, you can be my bit on the side ;) )

I'm Not In A Very Good Mood

And it hasn't been helped by my brother and Jim deleting my 7 year old Amazon wish list. Here's my new one... Jae's New Amazon Wishlist Thank God I did that post yesterday!!!!!

Evolution Of A Wish List

My Wish List has been around almost since the beginning of this blog. Over time it's changed almost as much as this blog has as you, Dear Constant Reader, have purchased things for me or I've come into money (for which read "got new credit card") and I've added more and more things to it.

The first few items on there are the remnants of my wish list from design. I once set out and spent time on Amazon finding the things I really wanted. So there's the Six Feet Under Box Set or the only Sue Townsend book I don't own; Adrian Mole: The Wilderness Years. Then the obsessions took over.

Sharks. I love sharks. And wow, I added quite a few shark related books and videos! Then I moved off into more random waters and added a few "evolution of the future" books and DVDs like the awesome (and desperately wanted) The Future Is Wild

Then it returns to a more natural progression as tidbits are added as and when I came across them; The Husband by Dean R Koontz through to In Me Own Words: The Autobiography of Bigfoot (thanks to Arwen for that suggestion). All sorts of random stuff was added at that point... then the obsessions took back over with avengence.

My unemployed bumhood of a couple of months ago spawned a return to my comic obsession.... and boy does it show on my Amazon wishlist. To be honest I could trim a few off but then again I do want every single one so I think I'll just leave them there. But I love in the middle of these graphic novels up pops Another Gay Sequel - Gays Gone Wild [2008]. Random is as random does!

And finally one more natural progression... from comic books to just general nostalgia. These last things aren't going to make any one's list of top quality books or movies (except Where the Wild Things are, if you don't like this book then you have no soul!!!!!!) but they have an incredible amount of nostalgic importance to me.

Pinocchio And The Emperor Of The Night; has few redeeming features. The animation is crude, the sound quality horrible, and the plot insane. But it was also one of my most treasured movies as a child even if it's way too scary for anyone under 11 to be allowed to see.

The Animals of Farthing Wood; sure maybe it's well below my reading age but I love anthropomorphic animals.

Do I really need to explain Return To Oz [1985]?

When Will I Get My Picture In The Paper?

How difficult could it be to make £20,000 a year working for myself doing something that doesn't involve too much standard customer service? Here's my thoughts:

1) Become a tarot reader. There are so many fools out there who believe in this stuff (hey... I used to before I came out of my crazy phase) that I could pull in plenty of money. It doesn't involve pretend psychic abilities, just read the card and you're away... 

2) Further monetize my blogs and encourage my readers to always click on Amazon links on my websites whenever they use it thus netting me some cash

3) Found a religion. L Ron Hubbard only had one failing, he was totally batty. Surely if I were to sanely start a new religion and thus enjoy the fruits of my creation (shitloads of cash...). Hmmm... maybe it's time to resurrect Jaeontology.... if I remember correctly it involved us wearing necklaces made of paperclips at work... 

4) Write a diet book, a self help book or a New Age philosophy book. You need no scientific background to be successful in this field. 

There's so many stupid people out there with money... what other ways could we separate them from it?? ;) 

Pictures From Another World

Ooo... once upon a time in a land far far away (Snodland) there was a little boy named Jason.



He loved Thomas the Tank Engine more than life itself and would remember his Thomas the Tank watch for the rest of his life.



He was often seen in exotic locations such as Eastbourne, wearing the latest, trendiest clothes and hanging out with cool people like Uncle Nic



He took pleasure in the small things such as playing with his Uncle Claude's exciting pencil sharpener collection... these weren't just any old pencil sharpeners! These were working cars, working bingo ball mixers and working clocks that also happened to sharpen pencils! He loved them more than he'd ever be able to express.



He'd yet to discover cardigans are not known for their attractiveness.



A keen lover of cars, he liked to collect rusty old ones without doors.

So...

...there I was minding my own business and rereading Piece of Blue Sky on the District line to Hammersmith when Sarina bounds up to me like an overexcited Tigger.

Oh I've missed that girl, it was so good to see her.

In other news... I'm getting a little more confident in what I'm doing at work. Which is making me somewhat happier even if the more than occasional death threat puts a downer on even the best of days.

You know what would make life a lot better... some eye candy. Or even just some mind candy. The guys at work are bland looking and bland thinking. And it's driving me to distraction... but it's just football with them. That's the beginning and the end of their conversations. Nothing in between (unless there's some Bible studying going on... woo hoo...). I dream of some intellectual stimulation at work...

Jim told me I've been signed up to be quiz master at the local pub on 16th of October. Worrying. I think it'll be hard to find the right balance between fun and challenging. Make it too fun and the hardcore quiz crowd will become annoyed, make it too difficult and it stops being fun for most people. Hmm... so no cryptozoology round then...

I'm Dreaming Of A Way Out Of The Rat Race... Still

Yeah. Working sucks doesn't it? Why can't I just be a pimp or the guy at Makro who checks your receipt before you leave? Those are the sort of cushy jobs designed for a lazy arsed bastard like me. Thanks to the person who surfed to Amazon through a link from this blog and purchased a Britney Spears CD... you just earnt yourself a Jae Kay Merit Badge...

I feel so gay. That's how I'd describe it... a sudden renewed interest in men, my liking for camp pop music returned and my interest in gay politics refreshed... all since Friday. Well renewed interest in men means less subtle perving. ;)

Thanks to Jim (and Patrickblog) I'm in love with the Veronicas and Lady Gaga (Boys Boys Boys is awesome and Paparazzi rocks my socks soooo much!). New Zealand's finest.



And the rejection of Proposition 8 in California has served as timely reminder why we need to continue the long fight for freedom against the oppressive. Jim showed me the video below yesterday and I just thought; that's your argument against gay marriage??? Wow. Stupid...



I feel sorry for folks who believe that Catholic charities removing their services is a bad thing!!! Catholics + Children = ? I'll let you be the judge of that one but personally I think adoption services by Catholics are probably a lot more dodgy than gay adoptions...

I Want Jensen Ackles Babies

That is all.

Lest We Forget

As is traditional for this blog on Remembrance Sunday, below is Wilfred Owen's "Dulce et Decorum Est"

Bent double, like old beggars under sacks,
Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge,
Till on the haunting flares we turned our backs
And towards our distant rest began to trudge.
Men marched asleep. Many had lost their boots
But limped on, blood-shod. All went lame; all blind;
Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots
Of tired, outstripped Five-Nines that dropped behind.

Gas! Gas! Quick, boys! – An ecstasy of fumbling,
Fitting the clumsy helmets just in time;
But someone still was yelling out and stumbling,
And flound'ring like a man in fire or lime...

Dim, through the misty panes and thick green light,
As under a green sea, I saw him drowning.
In all my dreams, before my helpless sight,
He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning.

If in some smothering dreams you too could pace
Behind the wagon that we flung him in,
And watch the white eyes writhing in his face,
His hanging face, like a devil's sick of sin;
If you could hear, at every jolt, the blood
Come gargling from the froth-corrupted lungs,
Obscene as cancer, bitter as the cud
Of vile, incurable sores on innocent tongues,
My friend, you would not tell with such high zest
To children ardent for some desperate glory,
The old Lie; Dulce et Decorum est
Pro patria mori

In May I had the chance to visit the graves of Allied soldiers in Kanchanaburi in Thailand who died during the war against the Japanese. It was a truly touching and emotional experience seeing row after row of headstones, labelled with every nationality and religion, age and class. Humanity still has a lot to learn.

We owe so much to those who died, but the thing we owe most is that we must never forget their sacrifice and we must redouble our efforts to avoid the loss of even one more life in pointless battle. May They Rest In Peace.

And you used to think I was a stalker....

Jim has shown me in the last week that he outshines me even in my stalking ability...

Evidence:

As The World Turns

Yesterday I made the trip down to my old work down in Vauxhall. Paul was having a leaving do, and as he is one of the old timers I thought I'd show my face. It's only been 3 months but honestly I could probably have named less than half the people there. It was just full of new people. There were a few hold outs down in accounts, and a smattering across the other teams but beyond the core customer service group the company might as well be one I never worked for. Which made me glad to have left.

But for those who I did know, I still have a great affection and much hugging did ensue. Paul's leaving do was much like mine: bowling and then noodles. The perfect recipe for a good night out. Bowling was great, noodles were yummy and it was so cool to catch up with everyone.

So I've learnt I don't miss Euroffice (hi marketing, using Google Alerts is so last year!) I just miss the people there. And as people like Paul are leaving and most of the temps I remember are soon to go, there is no point looking back. Just need to remember to meet up with them more often.

Oh and my other friends too. I've been such a bad friend these last few years. Sorry!!

Fare Ye Well Mr Crichton

When I was 10 years old I picked up a book that has brought me more pleasure than pretty much any book I've ever read since. It was Jurassic Park
and it is important to me as the book that marked my transition from a reader of children books into a reader of adult novels.

I thus owe a debt of gratitude to Michael Crichton, and I have been greatly saddened to hear of his passing. Whilst I think Michael Crichton held views on science and politics that I find abhorrent, and his writing has proved increasingly controversial, his books (including The Lost World and Congo) will always mean a lot to me.

May He Rest In Peace

Mmmm... Baby Eels!!

So... after a hellish day at work which finished with a grown man sobbing down the phone at me, after he had accused me of being homophobic and had kept me behind after work (I don't get paid after 5pm people!! Grrr...), I headed home and had five seconds to have a shower and get changed before Jim and I headed down the local to meet up with Denis, Karen, Nal and H. It was H's birthday celebrations and so we headed into town for dinner at Salvador and Amanda. It's a tapas bar, and not too bad considering. It has an interesting decor and the food was great. I recommend their lamb and their baby eels (a Karen suggestion done good... they are yummy!). 

We headed up to Cafe Nero in Soho before heading back for a night cap at the local. 

Today has been just another day at work, but I was pleased at lunch to see 4 people wearing Obama "Progress" t shirts. Go Obama!!!!!!!!!! :D We live a whole continent away and yet still we are waiting eagerly to hear who wins the American election. Did we used to get this excited when Truman or Eisenhower got in? I wonder... 

Giants On The Brain

Yesterday Jim and I headed down to Lympne for a "brief" visit with the parental units. Jim was going down to do his usual family duties of being ordered around fixing things. I spent my time watching telly, being called old by my younger brother and attempting to avoid upsetting my sister which is always difficult to do. Yesterday she mentioned how she was glad my Nan hadn't come down as "she can be annoying". When I told her off for that she went off into a terrible strop. Hmph. 

Later on Uncle David, his Mexican girlfriend Cecilia and his daughters turned up (they're living there whilst he sorts out a house now he's back from working in Mexico) and we all laughed our way through X Factor together. 

We got home at about 11pm which allowed us time to head to the local for a closing time drink. Which meant we didn't actually get to our house until 3 am!! But it was actually a really good day. 

Today, nothing to special. Lunch at the pub. 

I'm totally focussed on my latest subject of choice... giants. I'm doing some posts on them over at Moonlight Investigation. Speaking of which... here's my favourite piece of "research" so far ;) 

YUM!

They Played The Monster Mash!

Happy Samhain, Blessed Be. Enjoy some spooky musical treats :D 

Monster Mash - Bobby "Boris" Pickett and the Crypt Kickers featuring Cary Grant and Priscilla Lane



Purple People Eater



I Put A Spell On You - Bette Midler



A Rather Haunting Rendition of Come Little Children





Hellbent a gay "horror" movie. :D

David Tennants Leaves Doctor Who!

We knew it was coming. But still, it is very sad. David Tennant has made it into my top three Doctors of all time thanks to the energy he brought to the role. Thank you Mr Tennant, you will be missed!!

But... in another story about the royal premiere of the new James Bond movie there was a picture which cheered me up...



I know... I'm a royalist and I should not be thinking about the future King and his brother in certain ways but... PHWOAH! That sofa looks big enough for three...

OK.... I apologise, I'm an awful person for even contemplating such a thing with their Royal Highnesses...

Home?

Mmmm... I'll have some pork katsudon please!!!!!!!!!!

I miss that place...

I Want A Dinosaur For Christmas!!

I now know that I want this for Christmas. I am truly, truly sad that I cannot be 5 years old again so that I could really get the best out of this amazing toy... :(

Halloween Horror

Plan B is having a fancy dress party on Friday for Halloween. I won’t be attending, as fancy dress and Jae do not mix. I am still scarred from the time my Mum dressed me up in a box as the clock from “The Mouse Ran Up The Clock” and I had to spend the entire day at school standing up (although a few years back I won best dressed boy at work’s “School Days” day when I simply put on my old school uniform… yay!). The theme of the party is “Dead Musicians” and they encourage attendees to dress up as famous dead musicians such as “Kurt Cobain, John Lennon or Judy Garland” but with added zombie effects like white face paint and blood. Am I the only one who thinks this is wrong?

I can understand dressing up as a fictional character, such as Dracula or the Invisible Man, for laughs. Nobody is likely to be offended by Herman Munster knocking on their door for treats. *QUE MUNSTERS THEME TUNE*



Dressing up as a famous person, even those who are deceased, also seems like truly innocent fun. But dressing up as dead versions of those who have killed themselves, been murdered or died through addiction problems seems to me somewhat more than just simply macabre.

Would I be happy if I saw someone walking around dressed up as my Grandad’s rotting corpse? Or as my Auntie Melly with a pale face and drip tubes hanging from their body? No. So why on Earth are people actually encouraged to dress up like the dead body of someone who was not only real but has family members still alive? Will there be anyone doing a Heath Ledger this year holding a bottle of pills (well not at a Dead Musicians party but you know what I mean…)??? Or is just the long term dearly departed who get to be so disrespected?

Even as I write this I think I’m being a little harsh and somewhat prissy but really when you think about it, isn’t it a little disturbing? What do you think?

Who Am I?

So there I was cyber stalking MT (Facebook is my friend [privacy settings cannot stop me...], I was thinking he'd probably aged badly... how wrong could I have been!), when I suddenly started getting nostalgic about the "olden days". And I don't mean about school (which I hated) nor do I mean my social life (which was great don't get me wrong). I mean about who I used to be. My inner self. I know that sounds incredibly like "up my own arse", pop psychological nonsense but how I am now inside my head is totally different to how I was then.

I spend my entire life thinking about the mundane. Be it thinking about catching a train, or answering the phone at work, or what I'm going to blog about tonight (not on this blog of course, I just make this stuff up as I go along... ;) ). How's that different to before, I hear you cry? When I was a teenager, I was a dreamer. I spent my time dreaming, imagining. And I'm not talking practical dreams, I'm talking imagining scenarios just for the sheer fun of it. Dreaming of a different world, just to pass the time. Entire series of movies played out in my head in the ten minute walk from school to my house. Or maybe, if I was thinking of real things, I'd be digesting the latest political story I'd read in the paper or pondering on my latest obsession (or MT, my constant obsession... sorry Jim, I love you! But I'll never stop fawning over my favourite football player...). I just don't do that anymore.

I tried giving myself some time at lunch today to let my mind run wild but found it had become very difficult not to think about money, or work, or the journey home. I've gotten rusty.

I think the problem is, I never give myself any free time. I'm always on my laptop, or listening to a podcast, or talking to someone. I never have quiet time to myself, just to ponder. I used to love my long walks around Folkestone, that was when I could truly let my mind run free. Maybe I should start getting off the tube early on the way to work and walk the rest of the way iPod free. Because I really miss dreamy Jae. He's much less boring that I am.

It's Nearly Samhain!!

When I was little I had the biggest crush on Omri Katz... such a cutie... Trust me any man with that hairstyle is still the object of my intense affection. I've never been the same since MT cut off his similarly styled hair and went for the short look. Devastating.

Jim Reinvigorates An Old Youtube Classic

Mormons Sex Posed

Mmm... you know my weakness for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Well it is not helped by the mormonsexposed.com website and it's evil calendar featuring hot Mormons!!



God darn those Mormons, they sure know how to recruit! Sign me up!

Two More Monster Movies

Well following on from The Host, I decided to check out two other monster movies I've been hearing about.

The first was Rogue



I'd heard good things and I wasn't disappointed. The basic plot is: a tour of Australia's Northern Territory ends in disaster (giant saltie attacks boat, all Hell breaks loose). But the acting is better than most B movies, and the CGI is pretty good too. I actually wanted the heroes to survive when usually I'm just praying the monster will get it over and done with quickly.

Speaking of which...

I followed up the pleasantly surprising Rogue with Shark in Venice. Now I'm a sucker for anything that has a shark in it, but if I'd researched this movie before watching I'd never have picked it up. The plot is basically a treasure hunt interspersed with random shark attacks in the canals of Venice. Sadly it is made by the same team behind the Shark Attack series and they have one terrible problem... they cannot edit a movie to save their lives. It's bad when you see the same boat go behind the main actor three times in one shot (almost as if they just kept replaying the footage...) but worse is how they handle the shark scenes.

Stock footage should have little place in modern movie making. But sadly Shark in Venice has so much shark stock footage it had me laughing out loud. One minute the actors are diving in a tight cave under the city, then the scene cuts to a shark which is not only quite obviously in deep ocean but is also surrounded by unusual tropical fish unlikely to inhabit the Venetian canals. Then it attacks and basically you get the same thing... leaving any suspense or drama to whither away.

Add to this some terrible acting plus a plot that was obviously written up on the back of dinner menu the night before filming and you have one truly awful movie. I stopped watching after half an hour, just as I did with Shark Attack 2. The B movie genre is crying out for a quality shark flick... we'll just have to keep on dreaming...

The Host

I read about this south Korean movie called The Host ages ago and thought it'd be right up my street. Giant rampaging monsters? Check. That is pretty much my street isn't it... ;)



Well I finally watched it today and was more than pleasantly surprised. The special effects were good, the acting was good. There was comedy and tragedy. There was an obvious use of the monster and the reaction to it as an allegory for democracy and freedom in south Korea, both in it's recent past and it's present.

Personally it's disappointing that we have brilliant movies like this coming out of Asia and we are still totally obsessed by the Hollywood scene. I know this is changing but Hero and the like are not the same as good, modern day Asian movies. And people... the Host is one of the highest grossing south Korean movies of all time! We need to get over our dislike of subtitles and explore the world of foreign cinema. It truly does bring up some gems... Love of Siam anyone? ;)

Turning A New Page

Tuesday I headed down the pub, reluctantly as I was quite tired, with Jim to have dinner and take part in the pub quiz. Jim and I were on our own once again and were expecting to do poorly, as is our record when it's just the two of us. So you can imagine our shock and joy when we came... first! Victory!!!

"Victory is sweetest when you've known defeat.”
Malcolm S Forbes

Won a nice £20.00 voucher. Mmm... which paid for dinner on Wednesday. :D Happiness.

Work. Work is... crap at the moment, I'm going through the "I still have absolutely no idea what to do and am embarrassed to ask" stage. It's my least favourite stage. :(

Today I was poorly so took the day off, but as a contractor I don't get paid if I don't go in. :(

Did allow me to write a long post about whether dinosaurs still exist or not over on my other blog. That blog has been quite the success already and I'm dead pleased with that.

Jim continues his vlogging career

Found out yesterday that the cool girl at work I'd be eyeing up as possible friendship material is leaving in a week. Hmph. Back to square one (Lewisham and Willesden). D'oh.

Check out this video below, it's awesome!!

Hmm....

... me thinks someone at the British Humanist Association sent the BBC a press release about their bendy bus anti-God campaign. To be honest I find it a disturbing development. Last year, when I first saw a Christian advert on a bus, I was greatly annoyed at the trivialisation of the subject. Now atheists have joined this silly, gimmicky fad.

I'm an atheist, Christians are the sorts of people who put up adverts... mainly because they are often after our money. Those without belief should not be following them in this pathetic, base attempt to appeal to those who probably don't have an interest in it either way. It's hardly going to make you think...

"There's probably no God". Oooo... insightful.

We Interrupt This Broadcast

After Jim's blog (which he has now removed, the cheek!) which made me green with envy at it's beautiful design Jim has moved on to new social media/Web 2.0 heights... he now has a vlog!! Am I jealous?? YES! I haven't even got round to doing a podcast yet... I'm so 2003.

Check out this little opening musical number using Jim's super cool technology...



And if you want to see his first vlog and subscribe check out his youtube page. Check it out he's even got a "drama" comment in the style of 13 year old girls everywhere. LOVE IT! :D

Hmm...

Friday we spent drinking down the local as Jim perved over the barman and I attempted not to. I'm good. Yeah... right...

Saturday... so Maggie's breakfast is becoming a Saturday morning ritual but this time Dennis, Nal and Hemal were there waiting for us and we all had breakfast together. Humourously, they ordered 20 minutes before we arrived yet we still got our breakfast before them. And whilst we got everything we ordered they were missing vital ingredients. After the waitress spilt coffee down the leg of the guy sitting next to us I thought they'd be more careful but not before scolding Jim on the hand with hot tea. All in all, another great breakfast... Maggie's style... :D

Jim's Latest Obsession....

The Erming Prince's

If you can you ignore the high quantity of "Erms" in this video, then you'll probably say phwoah!!

Catchy Uppiness

Tuesday night Jim and I joined a few folks down the local for the pub quiz. With much cheating, stupidity and merriment we took 2nd place (and the winning team got double points on one round so we would of won if they were playing fair. ;) ) . That beats our last best placing at Christmas; third. Onwards and upwards. I think it was helped by there being a sci fi round. :D Aced that.

Wednesday... erm... after two nights out I had an early night. Ah sweet sleep.

Thursday... pub for meal then home for telly watching.

Work is alright at the moment except for the mean tenants and the boredom.

Got paid today. Sure I got last paid last week too but I couldn't get any money out. Today I skipped around Tesco's in Hammersmith Mall singing Money Money Money as I picked up breakfast, lunch, snacks and Coke. Goodness.

On the way home Lewisham and I sat opposite Toby Anstis. She was very subtle about exclaiming... "Oooo... he looks like Toby Anstis" followed by "IT IS TOBY ANSTIS" (he was literally directly opposite us, if he didn't hear her he must have been deaf). This was then followed by her loudly relating how much she used to fancy him. After that we moved on to other exciting topics which Lewisham was happy to spread around the carriage. At one point a child started singing "Twinkle twinkle chocolate star" causing Lewisham to turn to me and loudly declared "Oh I bet you like chocolate stars Jason!".

The shame. In front of a celebrity too... *shakes head*

Sex At The Tube Station

Last night Jim and I had dinner around Gloria and Gus' house as they are soon to head off to Grenada for six months. I'm not jealous. Much. Caz was there too so it was sort of another mini "locals" night out. Gus cooked us some wonderful Caribbean cruisine, Jim will have to tell you what the pork was but it came with yams, sweet potatos, plantains and green bananas plus, of course, rice and peas. Mmmm.... it was gorgeous. This was followed up by much wine, a Crème brûlée and a homemade cherry cheesecake. I loath cherry. I LOVED THIS CHEESECAKE! That's how good it was. It was absolutely the nicest dessert in the world. I find a lot of cheesecakes have a citrusy sort of bite to them, but this one tasted fresh and delicious.

Anyway... today at work felt a little better than yesterday even though I sit in the middle of the room with no one near me as the other four desks on my pod are "broken" in various ways. :( On my trip home I nearly bit Lewisham's ear off, I was so pleased to talk to someone who wasn't a tenant!!

On the way home at Canary Wharf I did my usual trick and took a wrong turn in the station and ended up going out the Upper Bank Street exit. No one goes up that way. I saw one other person coming down the escalator. Compared to the chaos at the other end of the station it was like being taken into a different time and place. As I was about to get on to the escalator I saw a couple standing around the side, not quite out of sight. They were standing up, not even discreetly against a wall, and having sex. I obviously didn't stare but I have to say in the few seconds it took me to register what they were doing, I didn't get the feeling either party was enjoying themselves. Bizarre...

Mmm... Maggie's again...

After going without food for an mindboogling 36 hours (except for a chocolate biscuit at work) I was pleased to arrive at Maggie's cafe in Lewisham today and devour their cheap all you can eat breakfast. Yum, yum, yum. HAPPINESS.

Charles Dera: As Usual

Due to a severe lack of male totty at my new job I'm having to resort old pictures of Charles Dera to keep me happy. The worst thing is that now that he's doing straight porn all the new pictures of him involve naked women... hurrumph!

The Downsides

My posts about my new job have been fairly bubbly and positive, because I feel fairly bubbly and positive about it. But it's not all happy times.

Willesden and Lewisham are really my only "friends". I don't have a laugh with anyone else, most of the people there are either the bland drones I grew used to at Three Valleys Water or are just not my sort of people (like the rude, misogynistic Jehovah Witness who says he's off to Bible class just after going "Look at the arse on that" when a female colleague walks past causing me to clench my fists and stop myself from beating him... either be a Jehovah Witness or be a player... you can't be both!!). Euroffice certainly did one thing right, it contained some of the most fun and most interesting people I've ever met. And I miss them terribly, even if I know that I made the right choice to leave. I'm terrible at keeping in contact as I have no money or phone at the best of times so if any Eurofficers are reading this pass on my fondest regards to everyone... miss you all loads!

I just wish there was someone there on my wave length... at least most people at Euroffice could comprehend my idiosyncracies even if they still thought I was bonkers. At this new place I don't think they can even comprehend some of the stuff I'm reading at lunch... and that's not to say they are stupid, it's saying they live on a totally different planet.

Oh well, otherwise things are ok there, most people are nice at least, which is better than nothing.

The Company

I've just starting rereading Company by Max Barry. I can always derive pleasure from reading books over and over again, Stephen King's It is read at least once a year for instance. Love it. Company is one of those books which really is amazing and stands up to repeated readings (even if it is stained with some sort of brown substance which concerns me somewhat...). It's so easy to read, hilarious and has a really quirky and interesting premise; what if you had no idea what the company you worked for did?

Speaking of which... having just started a new job myself I've begun to observe a few things about my new place of work. There's Tia (names changed to protect the innocent) an aging lady originally from the Caribbean whose booming voice fills the office every time she's on a phone call. There's Croydon who sits directly opposite me and spends her entire life just laughing. Willesden and I have been taking various, amusing multiple choice questions about Data Protection and the Disability Acts. Amusing because they feature such questions as "Which of these is not a disability:

1) impaired vision without correction
2) impaired hearing
3) pyromania"

Hmm... can I phone a friend??

Lewisham is enjoying herself quite a bit on reception and is desperate to stay there dropping not too subtle hints every two minutes whenever in a managers presence along the lines of "Oh I love being on reception" or "I think I could stay on reception forever and never get bored".

The sense of compliance at Plan B is worrying. As I was training on a different floor to my department today I came back to my desk at two minutes to five to switch off my computer. Switching off my omputer two minutes before five (when I had nothing else to do on it!) appears to have been a cardinal sin, causing some to let out a gasp and others to whisper warnings of what happens to those who break this rule.

A high level of fear seems to prevade the office, but I quite like that. It'll keep me on my toes and make sure I don't lapse into terminal boredom as I did at Euroffice.

Shark In Venice!!!

Could you imagine a better movie??

I'm already breathless with excitement at the prospect...

Stalking Goodness!

Mwhahahahahahahaha. Stalking Jae is back! And is on top form as always...

That is all.

The Incredible Hunk, Volume 1, Issue 11

CUTE!

Yoinked from Gay Boy Thailand