Christmas. I love Christmas. But sadly I am going to have to admit that looking back over my Christmas posts of Olde shows I actually get very depressed over Christmas. Which is sad... but unfortunately it's happening again.
Last night Jim was telling me about a disagreement he had at the local and I said one sentence in which I tried to see the issue from the other guys perpspective, to understand why he would even be upset with Jim. And Jim took offense to that, didn't let me continue (and put the remarks in context. I wasn't blaming Jim... I was just trying to comprehend the situation.) and stormed out. When I asked him where he had gone he just sent back a text saying "You insensitive prick" and that was the last I heard from him. To be honest I don't know why I bother talking any more I only ever seem to upset or hurt people.
So last night I went for a walk for a couple of hours, and when it got too cold and I got bored of sitting on freezing benches, I returned to the local to read for a couple more hours. It gave me time to reflect that I always seem to find myself wandering in the cold at this time of year feeling less than chipper.
I tried to sleep on the sofa at home but that wasn't exactly successful and now here I am at work with projects to do, people to shout at and more work than I really have time for. And when I finish work tonight there is not much to look forward to. I might frequent the bars of Vauxhall or wander into town and see the Christmas lights or see if I can tag along with the mysterious Wednesday Club who are a secretive drinking group from work.
Yay. Another Happy Christmas in the world of Jae.
Really I don't know why I get excited about Christmas. But I suppose I'll have forgotten about how bad Christmas usually turns out to be by next year and will again get out my Christmas Dog and my Christmas smile. Until the next bad thing happens.