Friday, December 26, 2003


Xmas happened. Family came over. I got presents. I ate lots. Just your regular run of the mill Christmas. Went out with Laura, Matt, Pete, Zoe and Ray to Gee's on Christmas Eve.

2003: The Wasted Year?

I had written a very hatefilled post looking back over the year. But as often happens my optimism and willingness to believe in fairytales came back to me, and I deleted that draft.

I have wasted 2003. Spent 6 months of it with someone who, in the end, didn't love me. Spent the other six months being nice to people who didn't deserve it and being nasty to others who didn't deserve it either. In fact 2003 is the year I most regret so far.

So 2003: trips to London, Brighton, Sheffield, Canterbury and even Planet Thanet; the start of new friendships and the beginning of the end for others. A boyfriend, an ex and some other randoms; a new shallowness touching my soul.

2004. Assert Jaeness over all parts of life. Find someone who actually loves me. Find some gay mates who will actually be there for me. Move out. Take no more fucking shit from anyone. Too long. I shall not allow people to walk all over me.

The barriers I'll break them down
I'll prove myself, I'll stick around
I'll get through it all somehow.

We Remember

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