Thursday, December 07, 2006

Being Tall

Most of the time I don't really notice being tall. Sure I'm 6'9" but I've always been tall, I feel normal!

But some days I really do feel extra tall! Days like today. I feel so awkward on days like this. Just walking through the doors becomes annoying. Normally I duck under them without even thinking about it. But when I feel like this I get to the door, stop, stare into that dusty place above it that very few people ever get to see (trust me when I come round your house I will always find those dusty places you missed!), and then awkwardly duck under the door. It's all a lot of effort.

Recently I've noticed something worrying. I'm starting to get broader. My shoulders are certainly larger than they used to be (I can remember I used to measure them with my hands and wish they were larger... so I know!!) which is not quite as desirable as you might think. The doors in our flat are quite short and quite slim. I'm approaching the point of actually filling them!

And trains. They are becoming annoying. I don't know whether I'm growing again or something but I am now a couple of inches taller than the crevice that leads to the door (I'm probably now half a foot taller than the doors themselves). This makes for interesting travelling on busy trains. Or on trains with an annoying shortarse blocking my way out of the crevice.

And it's winter. And you all know how I feel about umbrellas.

I've started to notice the staring again. And the whispers behind my back. No I'm not paranoid!

When I was 16 I was about 6'5" and people began to stop me in the street so they could exclaim "God, aren't you tall?". A couple of years later I got to the height where people stopped doing that and instead would just stop whatever they were doing and stare. Even if they were directly in my way. And they often thought I was deaf and say to a mate "Fuck ain't he tall??".

As a self conscious teenager this used to bother me a lot. But as I grew older I stopped even noticing it. It still happened but unless who I was with pointed it out I wouldn't hear or see it. But it's started to bother me again. And it's starting to make me angry. I want to go up to them and scream at them about how I didn't stare at them despite their horrendous looks, so they might want to extend said courtesy to me. And I didn't really want to mention just how fat their were but if we're mentioning the bloody obvious... etc... etc...

I hate days like this. Maybe screaming at someone might make it better... that'd sure put the fear of God into them.

Technorati Tags: Tall

4 comments:

  1. Anonymous11:15 pm

    I'm not especially short, (5'2") but I am shorter than the overwhelming majority of adults. I get my fair share of supposedly humorous remarks. I suppose I could compensate by wearing high heels but I prefer to be able to move around safely. Also, in heels I walk like Margaret Thatcher, so that leads to even more comments.

    When I am literally looking up to people and they are literally looking down on me, that often translates subconsciously into its metaphorical equivalent. Which I am used to, and can deal with, except in situations when I am already feeling short of confidence.

    As a complete digression, my word verification is stdgwb

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  2. The world is a strange place and one of the shortest men I know is also from Folkestone. Be happy with your unique features. Tall men are hot and much more sucessful in the business world than others with less verticality.

    As for Blogger features -- every time I see a word verification thingy I try to use it in a proper sentence. Here it is...'Wiznctg' to you my lofty lad!

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  3. Anonymous11:35 pm

    I thought I had a taste of this, being 6'4".

    While I certainly have not experienced it as heavily as you have, I can see where you're coming from.

    It's a bitch when you're the only head above the crowd.

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  4. if you weren't so tall jae, the world would just be average height.

    Celebrate your tallness! push annoying people out of the way! go "fee-fi-foo-fumm i can smell small people here" and proceed to flatten everyone around you with your huge cock.
    You know, things like that.
    You're the best!

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