Corner Shop Conversation

Shopkeeper: "You must be 7'5" "

Jae: "Errr... nope, just 6'10" "

Shopkeeper: "Oh no, you can't be. I'm 6'7" and you nearly a foot taller than me".

Jae: (looks at shopkeeper who, despite standing on a step is still at least a foot shorter than Jae) You think you are 6'7"??????"

Shopkeeper: "Yeah... so you have gotta be 7'5" "

Jae: (backing away slowly) "Sure... yeah... whatever... byyyyyyeeee"

Happy Samhain

I wouldn't throw him out of bed for eating biscuits. Phwoah!

I'm so sorry for my lack of posting of late. Work is just getting silly and I don't have the energy to post at the moment. I can't wait for the weekend!

Normal service will resume asap!!! Honest!

As such I can't be arsed to write a good Halloween post (I did start on one called Ghoulish Greenwich, but that can wait for another day) so instead "enjoy" my least favourite Halloween post ever... and the one thing that terrifies me more than the Tories.


Creepy... more about that picture here

Oh and... my first ever Charles Dera pic was posted in a Shadow Person post...

Happy Birthday news.bbc.co.uk!

If there is one page my computers (work and home) have open the most often it's the BBC News page. After Wikipedia, I'd say it's my favourite website.

This week is it's 10th birthday and as it's formed a major part of pretty much every political post I've ever written I'd just like to say "Thanks BBC News!"

SHOCKER: Idiot Blackmailers Attempt To "Smear" Britains Least Respectable Family!

Now most people know I'm a Royalist, and I love our Royal Family. But I love them warts and all, and admit they are not perfect. So I find it quite humourous that some people thought they could try to blackmail a member of the Royal staff with evidence of possible use of drugs and involvement with sex acts. Hilarious!

Maybe these people don't know that sex, drugs and pretty much every other scandal possible has already been and gone when it comes to the British Royal Family and they are still around. Did they really expect a Royal aide to give in to their demands? This is the Royal Family we are talking about here, any aide with brains would know it'd be less pain to report the blackmail attempt then to attempt to go along with it. The implications of allowing themselves to be blackmailed whilst working for the Windsors would probably see them put away for years. Nobody is stupid enough to risk that.

If anyone out there thinks our royals are squeaky clean they are dreaming... they are just as human (and thus messed up) as the rest of us. Just think about Lord Frederick Windsor. (Ok, I'm not saying he's messed up as it was cocaine... Jesus I wish these rich people in London would at least do something original with their lives. Cocaine is so common! Sometimes I think I'm the only person in London who hasn't done it!)

Now think about Prince Harry and Prince William. In uniform. Or out. Whatever your preference. Yum. Now you see why I'm a Royalist! Gordon Brown and Ed Balls ain't half as appealing!

EDIT: Well Google has spoken and it looks like a lot of people have a feeling Lord Frederick is involved somehow. Google hits to my site are always so informative on what some people are thinking out there. Within just a few moments of posting a story I can usually get a good feel what the web savvy public think.

Tories Want To Complete The Breakup Of The UK

Sometimes I think even the Tories wouldn't go to some of the places they go to. Pander to the nouveux rich rather than their normal middle class base? Check. Continue to use xenophobic and childish language in the immigration debate? Check. But continue the break up of this United Kingdom begun under Labour? Surely they wouldn't go that far?

After all it was only in 1997 that their manifesto included a section on "Nationhood" a belief in maintaining our Union as one country rather than devolving power to all the different nations (of whom there are far more than just the 4 big ones!). They wouldn't stoop so low as to pander to the "English" who wish to see hundreds of years of Union destroyed, that'd be quite some u-turn.

Oh, who am I kidding... of course they'd stoop that low! It's the Tories after all, they have no scrupples about trashing patriotic policies in favour of nationalistic ones just to get elected.

At least Labour have been consistent (and honest) with their policies towards the nations over the last 30 years (even if I do so very much disagree with them) whilst the Tories flip flop desperately seeking the golden policy that'll finally get them the power they crave so much. A vote for Tory is a vote against principles.

The Darwin Awards

I watched The Darwin Awards today. Not exactly a good movie, in the same way Hitler wasn't exactly a good person. But it did remind me of one of the small joys of the t'internet: The Darwin Awards website.

Now sure, taking glee in others unfortunate deaths isn't in the best of taste... but a lot of these stories will make you laugh until you cry. Now read these stories and try to say that humans are not just stupid animals. It's part of our charm!

I also watch Superbad - GREAT MOVIE! Probably not a watch again and again kind of movie but certainly good for a laugh.

PEOPLE!

Remember that guy I told you about who was annoying me by constantly commenting on my family tree? I told him to leave me alone, so he sent me an apology... followed by more questions and comments! I ignored him as I had clearly stated I wanted nothing more to do with him. And then the other day I get a chain letter email from him! A CHAIN LETTER! One of those "If you don't annoy and disrespect at least 5 of your friends by sending this to them, you will die" emails. I've restrained myself from sending him a nasty email informing him of his obvious flaws. I am a good person... that kind of thing is beneath me. So I am venting on here instead.

Needless to say I've made my profile on Ancestry private to avoid this kind of thing happening in the future.

Maybe it's because I work in customer services and used to spend all day reading peoples emails to the company I work for, but I cannot stand the kind of stuff I'm being sent on www.genesreunited.co.uk. It just reminds me of the kind of stupid stuff I come across at work.

At work sometimes we'd find a really random email. I never used to believe it, but some people just RANDOMLY email questions to nobody in particular. I work for a stationery company. But despite this being obvious on our website we still get really odd stuff come through such as:

- One lady wanting to know why we had stopped manufacturing Rizla rollers. (Considering we'd never, ever sold them, it's a tad random).
- One man asking whether it was ok to allow his employees to work in a place where people are smoking. Said place was a tent with one side open. Well, at least on that one I got to write back that 1) we're a stationery company, not a citizens advice bureau, 2) perhaps this might be the kind of question he'd want to address to his local council and 3) a brief search on Google confirmed my suspicion that this would contravene the Smoking Ban, and that perhaps he might want to try using Google in the future to answer his questions. Of course I said all that in a much politer way.
- One woman who wanted us to help her find the end of her sellotape.

So when I receive a comment on my family tree along the lines of :

"My ancestor has a similar surname to yours. Their first name is different, so is their birth date and place (one in Kent, the other in Northampton) and oh their surname is spelt differently but could they perhaps be the same person."

I really, really have to try hard not to send them back a rude message. I've just found 5 different messages all along those lines in my mailbox, from 5 different people (admittedly in four cases the surname was the same, but everything else was different). I have to deal with enough idiots at work, why can't I do something in my free time that doesn't involve idiots??? I only ever send messages to people when the names, dates and places match up and even then it's more a tentative hello rather than a full on questions straight off. Is that too much to ask in return??

Oh well, now I've vented I'll go send them some nice, polite replies. "No I'm afraid we don't have a match". Such is life.

Tempus Fugit

So I've been off work for two days now and they've bloody flown past! Perspective of time really does change as you grow older and it only ever seems to go by faster. Except, of course, at bloody work.

Not only that but I just saw that my first crush, a boy who was 17 when I first saw him, is now 27!! 27!!! I wish I had a magic stopwatch with which I could stop time. It's extremely annoying to find time has whizzed past you whilst you weren't paying attention.

So what have I been doing with my days off so far? Being productive? NEVER! Work was too stressful for my liking so I randomly too days off to simply do nothing at all... I've watched loads of DS9 Season 6 (my Star Trek obsession is back!), seen a few nature documentaries (my nature obsession remains) and am about to watch Wrong Turn 2 (well, Dear Constant Reader, you know I love a good horror!).

Ah... bliss. Now I just need a Tardis or something so on Sunday I can come back and do all this again.

Abortion Isn't A Good Thing

I've always been pro choice but anti abortion; I believe in a woman's right to choose but personally I find the concept of abortion abhorrent. Recently I was reading the Economist and there was an article in there regarding a fresh debate on abortion. I was reading away quite fine until I saw the graph. 200 000 abortions in a year?? 200 000????

I simply am astonished that there are so many "mistakes". Should people who make the rather stupid and easy to solve mistake of having unprotected sex be allowed to solve their problem by aborting their child? Even Lord Steel thinks it's getting slightly out of hand.

I'm not saying abortion should be banned or made harder to obtain (even if my question above suggests I was!), we all know what lies down that road; death, disease and unhappiness.

However, we need far better safe sex education out there. We need to ensure contraception is used to avoid the need for abortions. I'm fairly sure a condom would cost less than an abortion.
Abortion should always been seen as a necessary evil and the very last line of action in the event of an unwanted pregnancy. Our consumer "get what you want" society should not be allowed to turn abortion into a form of contraception. It's far too gruesome a practice to allow it to become that.

Some Privacy Please!

We've got some scaffolding up outside our house at the moment as our front wall is being replastered and repainted. It's long overdue. It went up last week but nothing seemed to happen, as is the way with most things our landlord does.

However on Monday we got home to find work had begun and a lot of plaster had been removed. Being worried about thieves using the scaffolding to climb into our house we had locked all our windows from the inside. So we were quite pissed to find someone had come into our flat and opened them.

Tuesday... same thing but in the bedroom this time. It made me feel physically sick. It breaks our tenancy agreement for 24 hours notice before coming into our flat.

So I've booked three days off work from today and am at home, unable to relax completely wondering if the workmen are going to come barging through our door as they don't know I'm here. Grr.... But I can't wait to see their faces if they do.

What Lies Ahead

We all know how crowded London is. It can, at times, be a very unpleasant place to live. So it's a little disturbing to see that Britain might have a population of over 75 million people within a few decades.

For all the positive things people can do towards saving the planet, only having one child is probably the best one. We are at a stage in our evolution, physically and mentally, whereby we can reduce our population significantly and not suffer too much economically and probably see increased social benefits from smaller communities.

Less people means less waste. Less people means more space. Less people means an easing of the housing crisis.

Win win in my opinion.

Darn It!

England lost, but both teams looked hot so I didn't mind too much. Rugby is better than porn. :D

Hey! Who needs Facebook when there's a thing called Ning? Ning allows you to set up your own social network... yes... a social network all about you (or an organisation or blog). That way you can gather all your friends in one place and not need to worry about random friend adds or unwanted application requests.

I set one up for this blog just to test it... might be good for work as we can make it private.

Eye of the Gorgon: The Sarah Jane Adventures 1.2

I am a little behind with this stuff! Eye of the Gorgon proved that SJA is the best childrens telly out there. Well acted, good solid stuff. Brilliantly scary nuns helped too.

Rugby World Cup final tonight...



Mmm... Ben Cohen....

And I'm behind the boys all the way! Come on England... let's thrash those unruly Springboks...

Bobbing Along The Thames

Last night was a proper night out with work. Several reasons for it including Bonnie’s leaving do, celebration of our rebranding and launch of our new website and reaching a million pounds of sales with one of our newest suppliers.

We left work at 6 and all 40 off us caught the overground to Waterloo and then wandered, en masse, to Embankment Pier. After some wandering up and down the embankment to find our boarding point we eventually found our boat… the High Society.

We boarded and found a bar on the lower deck and a seating, dancing and eating area on the upper deck. As I could barely stand in the lower deck I spent much of my time up with the dancing peoples.

My boss decided to put my iPod on the sound system but after listening to “Brave Sir Robin” from Spamalot and some of the Monkees finest selection (I’ve got eclectic tastes… so sue me!) they decided someone elses iPod would be more appropriate. He he… We had some food and then some speeches. During the speeches we were told that although all of us had really made an effort, four people deserved special credit, and should step forward to claim an envelope. One person each from Marketing, Accounts and Technology were called forward and I sat there applauding and not really thinking I’d put in much of an effort to be in the running… and then my name was called! Wow. I won two “ecoupons” as is our company slang which grant me a day off work and/or £50 worth of HMV vouchers. We can’t decide whether it’s one or both as there are no terms or conditions. I’m hoping for both! ;)

Then we had a very brief lasting attempt at Karaoke where Phil showed us he had an amazing voice as he sung to Bonnie, our new CEO sung “I Touch Myself” and then we kind of gave up.

I drunk loads of spirits as Kasey and I spent our time getting each other random drinks (mmm… Navy Rum… *throws up*) Sadly our time cruising up and down the Thames was over before I knew it and I wandered to Waterloo with Paul before heading home. Despite having a horrid hangover this morning I wasn't too bad off... I hear the evening got incredibly messy after that.

I've uploaded some of the photos to Facebook and you'll see some links there if you're quick!

Mmm... Wispa

Once More Unto The Breach

Someone get me out of here. Stupid customers and colleagues asking idiotic and badly phrased questions then getting annoyed when I answer the question they asked. I hate how some people think that right now anyone else has time to translate they unasked questions.

Today is JPs last day. Wish I was going. But even if I really wanted to I just don't have the money to be able to say goodbye to this job. Life is a bastard.

And just now one of my colleagues called in to say they were never coming in again. Can I blame them?

You Have Gotta Love The Jim!

So work yesterday was horrible... really, really horrible. There I was thinking my opinion of other people couldn't possible get any worse. Then it did.

And today? Well today was worse. I had to listen as my colleagues were berated by irate idiots and at times I just wanted to go and take down some details so I could go and beat up the individual involved. Of course I didn't but I hate blokes who phone up and treat the girls like shit just because their girls. Don't think that happens? Ha! Racism, homophobia and sexism are all well and truly alive in customer services.

Anyway... I headed home late after a 12 hour day feeling very sorry for myself and found Jim had run me a foamy bath surrounded by candles which I soaked in until dinner was ready. I feel human once more.

I just wish there wasn't any work tomorrow. Today I booked off Wednesday through Friday next week so I could have a rest and avoid spending any money.

Mum called today. She's got herself a Facebook profile. :D She also promised there was some money on the way from my Grandad. This has become a running joke between Jim and I as this is what she promises every time I speak to her. he he...

She also told me about my Nans first trip on the internet where she sent an email to my uncle and sat waiting for him to reply. Bless her.

Leave Dave The Dolphin Alone!!!

I know I go on about this a lot... but... human beings are idiots. They should not be allowed near Dave The Dolphin. Now all their touchy touchy playing with this animal has meant she's gone and got half her tail cut off.

So much for "It's hard not to play with her, she likes it anyway and nobodies getting harmed" brigade.

I really think this world is too good for the likes of us.

The World Without Us - Blog Action Day

As you, Dear Constant Reader, may have noticed of late I've undergone a little bit of a regression back to my former nature loving ways; this fits neatly with my disillusion with modern "life".

And the book I've just finished, The World Without Us by Alan Weisman, has really made me think.

Our oceans are full of plastic, our soil and water filled with chemicals, such as dioxin, and we are desperately trying to work out what to do with our nuclear waste. If our species survives for dozens of generations the nuclear waste from today will still be with them. Doesn't that upset anyone?

Sure climate change is a major issue but sadly it's one of many and the current populism that environmentalism is undergoing is kind of making a lot of people forget that.

I really do think it's time our species thought about our quality of lives, our legacy to the future and our responsibilities as the dominant species on Earth. We live crowded stressful lives of consumption, and then profess to "love children and animals". How can you love children if you leave the next generation a polluted legacy? How can you love animals if you allow the destruction on an epic scale of habitats around the world?

I have to say I believe serious consideration should be given to not only immediate environmental improvements but to a long term population reduction strategy. I mean less people would = less stress, less consumption and would make preserving our world in a reasonable state far easier. Sure there are moral issues on population control (infringements on personal liberty, the cultural bias to male children causing disadvantage to females etc).

I think it's quite disgusting that our Government continues to pile responsibility for environmental action on the individual... recycling shouldn't need to occur as the need to recycle shouldn't present itself. Companies must not be allowed to spew out hideous amounts of plastic rubbish and excessive packaging. It's time the people of the world stood up and took their lives, and their planet, back.

No More Sir Ming

Sadness. Oh well... onwards and upwards I suppose.