come back to what you know

The Sunday Club

Firstly Stephen phoned me up yesterday to tell me about his latest piercing.... on his ear for once!! This is the second time he has phone dme in a week..... yay!!

Secondly I have reason to believe that someone has stolen Scooby and put a new collar on him (ignoring ours)... Mum says she saw him.

Work was so boring today... got in trouble as I called a customer a weasel..... whoops....

Watched Without Prejudice last night. Evil homophobic, ageist (he hates young men) bloke from first show was back on the panel. Even he was disgusted with himself after choosing a well off business man over a working class lesbian mother. Hello!!

Walking Higher

My ache to get away from this house is so great, that sometimes I feel like screaming. This afternoon, for instance, mum cried because the house was such a mess. It was spotless. Her and Tony's obsession for cleaning is driving me slowly round the bend. There is more to life than this!

But for the first time in years I am optimistic about being free from this. I now believe that my dreams have, at least, the chance of coming true.

One day I will live with a man who will make me smile, in a modest, carefree existence. I just need to grit my teeth thru this for that to happen.

One day my family will be what I make it.

Grrrr

Remind me not to read other peoples blogs. Well at least not people I know as it gets me depressed. Grrrr......

Firstly..... The Salon is most definetly the gayest show in the world. Yesterday morning I watched a fat gay man (trapped in the rat race of life) get a belly massage by one girl, while her twin sister gave his boyfriend/trophy house wife a facial....... sickenly good TV.....

I went out last night with Zoe and John, and we went to the Leas Club (sorry if I ignored you Ellie... I really didn't see you, I was MT cruising you understand...) and got the best shock in a while..... Sexy Bouncer is back!!!!!! On a Friday night now...... oh those arms......

In another good move... I saw Emily of training group fame, who explained why she never said goodbye (she was really ill) and seemed really glad to see me.... which was nice.....

At work they have put up posters declaring how all temps are now laid off (so thoughtful)...... with careful instructions of how to sneakily keep your job.... hehe.....

Anyway am still in orgasmic bliss at thought of Sexy Bouncerness.......... yay.......

Nothing Standing In My Way

This is so different to my blog entry one year ago isn't it? ....... see it here

In brief: after work last night got Legally Blonde from Blockbusters and me and Zoe watched it over my place (hence the title). V. funny.

Mum and Tony have just finished a bloody huge argument over money in the kitchen. Joy.

I think I may want to learn to drive. Why? Well the other night I had a dream about Grandad and Derek (please note the following morning Grandad was taken into hospital.... nothing serious thank the gods), and I remembered how much fun I had there, and I remembered how free I felt there. And I want to try and recreate that feeling here, and getting a car would at least get me some of the freedom that I had there. Although it would go against my religious principles. Hmmm.....

Grandad and Derek....... they live in a small cottage in the middle of nowhere in Suffolk. It has old MGs strewn across the drive, discarded projects of my Grandads. Some of the windows are broken, and have been for years. Nothing is used to cover them. The place smells..... lived in. Not bad, quite good in fact. The sofa is misshapen from years of different bums sitting in it. Down its sides are mystery objects (that is Dereks underwear, and a few old school textbooks). Dereks room (where I stay when I visit) is ssssoooo cool. Movie posters fill every space on the walls and ceiling. His collection of movies is unsurpassed. And he has seen about every single Hollywood movie ever made. And there is at least three computers in every room.... again discarded projects of my grandad. They even have a Commodore 64 in there living room (Chuckie Egg playage!).

Best of all are their two cats.... Cat and Fluff..... they rock..... Nobody bothers too much about cleaning, or worrying... It is my perfect home. I hate this house. All anyone thinks about is cleaning, tidying, moaning, and most importantly Keeping Up With The Joneses. It is less a house more a showroom to say "Hey look we are Middle Class now, come see how much better we are for it". I suppose it is because of our working class backgrounds. Mum and Tony are way too worried about being consumerist than they are about being happy, and having a good laugh.

Now I have been positive for about 17 days now. I have not allowed depression into my head this year. In one more year my debts will be gone, and I will finally be free once more. Free just to be happy! I look forward to that day so much.

*sings* It's gonna be a perfect day.... nothing standing in my way....

Ouch.... My Head Hurts

Firstly I must congratulate my "personal shoppers" taste...... he sent me a nice blue t-shirt with blue flame things on the arms... it rocks.... one slight problem is its hugeness...... but I am sure I can work something out....

Armed with a new top I went off to Spoons and meet up with Becky, thus had a great time. We always have such laugh gossiping, bitching, her calling me scary, me calling her a slut..... I think we planned to go out again next Tuesday as we had forgotten how much we are!!! I think however I have had a couple too many Stellas....

I am ssssssooooo horny today...... kiss me quick......

Oh yes Natalie of course I am interested. Sounds intruiging.

Could This Be The Gayest Show In The World

Reality TV breaks out....... in the form of The Salon. Oh yes, you can book an appointment at the Salon for just about any beauty treatment, and you get it free, and all you need do is be part of the show. It's like Big Brother where the contestants have to work, and interact with fame hungry members of the public, who just so happen to be having bad hair days. Junior Oliver came out *cough* yesterday. Please note. When you are not actually in the closet (this boy SCREAMED homosexual) there is no need to come out! This was after basically coming on to a naked client. "Do you work out?" (get some new chat up lines boy!) Oliver is very cute tho. At the same time Ricardo (the tranny Brazilian hair stylist) was trying to decide who he fancied more Paul, the manager or Adee. His gay client was not really bothered either way. (I think he was going out with the bloke Oliver was chatting up... thus he may have been a tad distracted).

Oh this is such hilarious TV.

Am going out with becky tonight... yay a Stella session awaits!

Hmm.... I think I have gained a personal shopper at highandmighty.com who keeps sending me clothes plus refunds...... I can't quite fathom why any longer.... but oh well.... somebody has to wear em...

WTF

OK I think you, Constant Reader, and I are the only people in this country who are not paedophiles. It seems that everyone else is completely obsessed about child sex. Are we the only people who have no interest in this at all? Parents who seem to be able to talk about little else are the kind of parents I think should be removed from contact with kids. Tabloids print disgustingly graphic details to tantilise their sick readers, no doubt. Hello!! Why not look after their children, remain vigilant, and let the police deal with it? Because then that would make them responsible for the lives they have brought into this world. And most British parents have no concept of responsibility. Rant over.

Stephen phoned me last night! Wow! That like never happens! It is always me that phones him. He comes back home soon for an operation on something I can't even pronounce, let alone spell! He seems to be looking forward to having gay mates stay over, which shall send his parents round the BEND! Muhahahaha

OK news on the job front. According to an undisclosed source, there is a new agency taking over the call centre contract. And it may well be they want to employ us temps due to our experience. You see I can keep the same job, just change employers. Complex stuff.

My addiction to Zoo Tycoon is over. My addiction to C&C: Red Alert 2 is only just beginning.

Have discovered there is this boy who lives just up the road from me who has the most gorgeous eyes, and the sweetest smile. *swoon* Bumped into him in the village shop. Mmmm......

I promise not to stalk him. Honest!!

With Prejudice

So yes on saturday, after a Terminator marathon, I watched Without Prejudice again. This show makes me want to get a gun, set up a defensive wall, and stay inside it for ever and ever. This weeks runner up supported animal testing. The winner didn't. They supported testing on prisoners.... When will this madness end!!!!

Then watched The Shining..... very scary.......

Yesterday I went to work to discover all the temps have been sacked. As yet no one has actually phoned from the Temp agency to tell me I am sacked. Which is rather inconsiderate. So it is time to start looking for a new job. I don't want to be a layabout again now do I?!

And finally, sorry to keep coming back to these people..... view this and see why I think Christians are secretly Pharisees working against the teachings of Christ.

**Later**

So I phoned the agency to find out where I stood, and it was confirmed, I will no longer be working at the call centre after Febuary the 9th. Fun. Where is that offer of a permanent job? Hmmm.... I do believe I have been right royally screwed.... again.... On a better note, the agency are looking for a new job for me, so hey I get to meet new people, oogle new men, and generally create Jae flavoured chaos somewhere else. Yay!

Also, my debts reared they ugly heads again, but I slapped em down with a quick £100 payment. That should shut em up. Oh there goes my savings!

Come Comrades, We Have Work To Do

Hmm..... have got a £59 refund from highandmighty.com.... how nice! Plus a new top to boot!

Went shopping yesterday and bought three DVDs (Coyote Ugly, Terminator and terminator 2 [don't you just love Arnie!]), a new game (Red Alert 2, am a hopeless fan of strategy games.... stems from my desire to overthrow the world.... muhahahaha.... always play as the Soviets......) and a new book (Number 10 by Sue Townsend, as she is one of my fav authors of all time!)..... retail therapy... don't it make ya smile! :o)

Three days off work in a row comes to an end today....... it has felt so good... just what I needed....................

A Great Evil Looms In The West

Firstly, Stacey has been sacked. She leaves on Febuary 9th. :o( I'll miss her. Her sunny outlook always brightened my day. And now my selfish thoughts turn to my own job. Will I survive this latest cut?

Secondly I finally took a risk and read the most disgusting, unChristian and God less site in the world. God Hates Fags. What possessed me I will never know. But now I have read it, I am more determined than ever to erase homophobes from this Earth forever!

Again this site continues the whole myth of the gay mafia. Now for all you sane people out there I would like to make this clear... we gay men do not have secret meetings where we plot the downfall of governments/religion. We don't hide in the shadows and dream of recruiting more "children" (I quote from the site) into our evil plans. All I want is a cute boyfriend, who is a touch insane, a whole pride of cats, a nice flat, and stable job. I couldn't give a fuck about converting others to homosexuality, and when I do suggest such things it is in jest! .......

Oh fine you win, I am planning on taking over the world. We shall seduce you children into following us, via TV and school. And once we have taken over the earth we shall make everyone wear Prada, adopt Better The Devil You Know as our anthem, and create the Jae salute, a limp wristed version of the Hitler salute. God fearing Christians shall be feed to Brian Blessed. Muslims to George Bush. Oh and yes it is true. We eat babies. To read more of our cunning evil plots to destroy you comfy lifestyle read here

OR NOT!! The writers of God Hates Fags are people we should feel sorry for. Imagine being that dumb. I mean I am nt the sharpest tool in the shed. But God just IMAGINE! I expect they have difficulty just getting out of bed. They actually took that Revolution article seriously (here), as if it wasn't a rebuke of everything they themselves stand for! It seems quite obviously to be an ironic piece. If it wasn't I don't think that the writer really represents gay men everywhere now does he? A bit like saying Hitler represents all hetrosexuals everywhere.

How Sweet!

This so backs up my belief that Samwise and Frodo are sssoooo gay. I was really annoying Zoe on Tuesday when she came round to watch the Fellowship of the Ring, by suggesting just how gay they were!

Poor Zoe had to deal with a really icy road on her way home, my road was literally covered from kerb to kerb in a thick layer of ice. :o/

Last night we watched rat race, and I bought Dogma (which so rocks). It only cost £6.99 on DVD. Bargain!

Am skiving off work today.

Mmmm.... eye candy......



OK gay sex. You would think that from a gay point of view it was simple. But oh no. Gay men obviously can't do simple.

In my surfing I have come across such sexual diversity it is amazing. That is a good thing. But it would seem that fights are erupting all over the place. The "Cockrubbers" don't like the "analists" (what a crappy word!). The cocksuckers don't like the rimmers (oh dear brand new take on Red Dwarf). What the fuck is going on?!

Hello.... whatever the fuck your into, why on Earth would you need to bad mouth what others are into? Well as someone who doesn't fit neatly into any of their categories, I am disgusted. We have homophobes to deal with and all these gay men can think of to do is bad mouth what other guys get up to in the privacy of the bed room.

So I say it loud, proud and clear....... celebrate all things sexual, all things that make people happy, and turn your hatred on those who are prejudiced against others for no reason.....

Note to self...... hit Stephen over the head with an iron if he is racist or homophobic to Lesbians again.

I am Nothing!



Which Enemy of the Christian Church Are You?

Take More of Robert & Tim's Quizzes
Watch Robert & Tim's Cartoons

Time To Get My Legolas Over?

You are Yourself! Gay, straight. These words mean very little to you. You are yourself and that's all you need to know. You fall in love with the same gender, but you believe that isn't all there is to you. Your lack of "traditional" gay pride is interpreted by many queers as internal homophobia, but in truth you just want to be your true self. Not just gay.

Take the what kind of fag are you quiz by PsychosisX!

Thanks to Luke for the quiz

Please note being gay does mean something to me. Being just plain marvellous is what it means!

Today was so tedious. Let us leave it at that.

A Comedy Of Errors

Today I felt rather.... groogy.... tis the best word I can use.

Last night I went to see The Two Towers, which rocked. Can I marry legolas please?! then off me, John, Zoe and pete wandered down to gees, and much jukebox fun. Feel into a deep sleep.

I got up, called a taxi, and the taxi arrived. I strode confidently towards it, until I realised that my steep drive now resembled an ice rink. Too late! One leg went up, the other down, and I hilariously collapsed. :o(

I get to Cheriton and the barbers, Alishas Attic is playing on the radio. "Push It All Aside". I realise that it was a year ago yesterday that I left Brighton and began my little adventure. Scary how fast time goes by now.

To cheer myself up, (remembering that I promised to smile a lot this year! ;o) ) I went and bought The fellowship of the Ring. Nothing to do with a certain gorgoeus elf I must add!

In Tesco's some rude, horrible assissant made me feel awful. :o(

work was 1) dull and 2) sad. Most of my lesbian posse have been sacked by homophobes. The rest are leaving soon, and hav been made part timers. I saw them today, and they seemed so down. :o(

Got home to find Tony had locked my babies out in the cold! Grrr..... anyway once i started to snow I found em and got em inside.

ITS SNOWING REALLY HARD!! How will I get to work tomorrow?

Do You Really Believe That Anything Is Going To Get Better Without Me In Charge? ;o)

Firstly I saw a great/terrible show last night called "Without Prejudice". It's a game show where a group of members of the public judge five other members of the general public, to decide who gets £50000. It was good in that it was deeply addictive. It was bad as it really showed just how far things have still to go in getting rid of bigots. Some snippets "he has really big ears". "He is way too young". "He is too old". "He will just spend it on leather and *poppers* (the bloke actually said the scientific name)" (that was about the gay guy who, please note, was a father, a restaurant manager, and the most boringly ordinary person on the show)

Even Lisa Turbuck, the brilliant presenter (ok so I'd like her even if she presented "Songs Of Praise"), looked shocked by the time it was all over.

And then we have this story. I know, I know, every one is against asylum seekers. I am to a certain extent, simply because they pose a threat to my way of life. But come on!! Hello!! He comes from Zimbabwe. He is white, gay and talented (let us for the moment forget he is also undoubtedly rich, posh and feed with a silver spoon). He will be slaughtered if he returns to that hell hole of a state. Let him work at least and pay for himself, instead of forcing him to seek family friends aid.

Oh good Lord I worry about a country where our cricketeers are seriously contemplating playing in Zimbabwe. Mugabe= Hitler. Mugabe is killing his people. And we wnat to go play a team of cricketeers to whom he is patron? Blah!

The solution is obvious. I must take over the world. There we go, problems sorted. :op

Let It Snow Let It Snow Let It Snow

It snowed today.... it's all melted now, but it did snow.

Thursday night Zoe came round and we watched Toy Story 2. I lurve that movie. Also I became addicted to Zoo Tycoon.

Friday I went out with Zoe, Adam and Pete to Leas Club. We saw scary rude boys loitering outside Mcdonalds as they couldn't get in. SAD! Anyway meet Ellie and Annie, which was cool.

Am tired, will go sleepy buys now.

Yay Emmsy has stayed!

Let the children lose it
Let the children use it
Let all the children boogie

I love the word "boi". Tis cool!

Boi and tis now enter my fav words list..... right up there with fabtastic, chuckalicious and kerazy!

Ok so I have decided to be as positive as I can be this year. Not to worry too much. And smile as often as possible.

hmm..... why do gay men like me? I innocently chat to them and suddenly..... bam, they are arranging a date before I can say "But I never said....." If i was some hunky studmuffin, with a sparkling personality then I could understand it. But a slight geeky tall freak shouldn't attract so much attention! Oh who am I too complain? I shouldn't worry so much about men who think I am sexy. They have friends to do that I am sure.

Whimper..... work was ssssooooo busy twas unreal. I miss sexy Dutch guy. He was sssooo fine. Oh back to lusting after a certain hunky MT. Oh he makes me weep. Nothing strange there.... lots of guys make me wet.....;o)

Sorry dirty mind gets free rein......

What Am Doing Without You?

I hope everyone had a fab New Year! Mine was none too shabby! Mum kindly agreed to give me and Adam a lift to John's house in Canterbury. John gave us some quite easy to follow directions and we set about following them as best we could. Stone Street was closed at several points along the way due to flooding, Mum ignored the barriers and braved the tepid waters (a slow stream and the occassionally large puddle).

We were heading in the right direction, but didn't know if we had missed our turning so we stopped at the side of the road just to check with John. As we stopped I noticed something. We were right next to Stephen's old school. Due to the roundabout way we had come I hadn't realised we were in this part of Canterbury! It turned out John lived one street down from Stephen, in a part of Canterbury I know really well!

Lots of people came to the party there was me, Adam, John, Elliot, Zoe, Laura, Pete, Sophie, Kim, and Matthew. It was good and I had a good time. I arranged to meet Stephen at half past midnight. I got to his house, knocked, no answer. His mum gave me the evils from her bedroom window. She really doesn't like me! i tried phoning, but the network was overloaded. Some fireworks went off dramatically above me, and I wandered back to John's. A little later Stephen phoned, and I went and meet him and brought him back to John's. By now Elliot, Kim, Sophie and matthew had run home.

Pete was almost comatose by the time we got back! Dirty stop out! Anyway me and Stephen proceeded to get more and more dirty and vile until we decided to discreetly go back to his house (it was about half four in the morning). Our entrance was blocked by his twin who had set up a bed in the hallway and as talking to his girlfriend on the phone, he seemed suprised to see me again after so many months/years. He he. twas funny to be back in Stephen's house after my long term ban.

Then I failed in my bid to go without sexual contact. Sorry. :op

Got back to John's just after five. I settled into an armchair, and despite the others all having shenagans, I feel asleep.

I awoke, and after a quick tidy up, we went to Sainsbury's down the road and got crossiants and pain au chocolat. Mmmmm........... half the car park was completely under a good few inches of flood. Very amusing.

Zoe bless her heart, gave me a lift back to boredom. Blah! me no like house.