The Murder Of Matthew Shepard - 20 Years On

Stonewall Continues To Live Up To Expectations

In the last decade Stonewall has become infamous for dividing the gay community. It's opposition to same-sex marriage, it's attempts to criminalise gay youth and it's "pragmatic" opposition to boycotting businesses owned by homophobic world leaders all show it really doesn't have the best interests of gay men (the group I'm a member of, I'm not LGBT [I've come to see that term as an attempt to neuter and desexualise lesbian, gay and bisexual folk] though sympathetic and supportive to the LBT elements and their own struggles) in mind. 

Now it has withdrawn support for Pride In London. That's right. They won't boycott a hotel owned by a homophobe. They won't support same-sex marriage without INTENSE levels of shaming by thousands. They encourage parents to report their gay kids (who may not even be out!) to the police. But they will withdraw support for the biggest Pride event in the country over diversity issues (I've no idea of the validity of the concerns, they might be right to do this but given their previous actions it seems somewhat mad they are suddenly decisive over something) and go on to support Black Pride (which doesn't sound like a diverse event to me...).

I honestly can't believe companies and individuals continue to give money to an organisation that seems hell bent on dividing and destroying the communities it claims to represent (of course it's only been representing trans people for half a decade after quite the debate... slow to every cause unless it involves undermining (or locking up) lesbian, gay, bi and trans folk) 

Some Of My Favourite Scenes From Gay Movies

Jeffrey 1995

Patrick Stewart stole the show in this AIDS era comedy with a heart. Full of memorable lines, but this was the best exchange in the whole movie between his character and his nice but dim partner Darius.

Darius: Who's Martha Stewart?  

Sterling: She writes picture books about gracious living. Martha says that nothing else matters if you can do a nice dried floral arrangement. I worship her.  

Darius: And, um, who's Ann Miller?  

Sterling: Leave this house. 

Trick 1999

Coco Peru's monologue in Trick is something to behold (she actually runs her own Youtube channel which is PURE DELIGHT. Watch it. Now). IT BURRRRNNNNNSSSS.



Beautiful Thing 1996

Another movie that has loads of quotable moments. Jim and I often quote endlessly from this movie especially:

Jamie: You know who Claude Monet is?  

Sandra: Jamie, don't make me out to be thick. 

Jamie: Who was he then? 

Sandra: He painted the Sixteenth Chapel.

But, obviously, there's nothing quite like it's closing scene...



The Love of Siam 2007

I mean... this is one of my most beloved movies. The soundtrack is just as awesome as the story itself. Just plain perfection.



Get Real 1998 

A proper coming of age film this one... and from the BEST YEAR EVER. Ahem.




Jongens 2014

Recently gay movies have become... hmm... a little soulless. Jongens is a rare and welcome exception.

I Am Not Ashamed

Being more than a little interested in marriage equality articles means I come into contact with a great deal of negativity every day. From the concerned folks who worry about homosexuals and the future well-being of our souls, to those who think we are paedophiles, monsters and/or bound for Hell, it all boils down to one thing; being gay is not okay and is at best something worthy of sympathy.

After a while it starts to get you down. How can so many people, often well-meaning and intelligent, be so negative about something that they don't even seem to understand? How can they cast judgement so readily over something so unworthy of that judgement?

Well I reject this viewpoint. I reject it with every part of my being. My sexuality isn't something I look for acceptance of. It's not something I look for tolerance of. It's something I embrace, celebrate and enjoy. It's a positive in my life, a piece of untainted joy. Jim sometimes says I'm a bit too focussed on gay issues but that's because gay issues excite me in the way Star Wars, dinosaurs and history excite me. They are all something I love and find rewarding.

I remember when I was just coming to terms with my sexuality, desperately ashamed due to my then ongoing fling with Christianity. I remember the day I first saw a boy who made that shame just disappear. His beauty was so intoxicating I couldn't even think of disliking how I was feeling. I knew then that my sexuality wasn't something that was going wrong with me, that needed to be fixed, but something that was a good thing.

The strange thing is that often people seem to just equate homosexuality with lust. I didn't feel lust towards my first crush. He was too beautiful for that. And I don't just fall in love with men because of their looks. I fall in love with who they are as men. Their personality and their character are far more important to me than looks and love is far more important to me than sex (not to say I didn't mess around a little as a teen, as you Dear Constant Reader know only too well!).

I love men, and I'm not ashamed to say it. I love their looks. I love their voices. I love how they think. I love how they act. There's nothing, not a single thing, wrong with that.

I refuse to allow people to tell me what my sexuality is and how I'd be better off conforming to what they want for me. I'm not going to repent for something that needs no repentance. I'm not going to apologise for something that needs no apology. And I'm not going to reject something that brings me happiness every single day through the man I love.

When I think of a life without Jim, I feel myself die a little inside. For the last year and a bit he's had some very serious health problems and it's really made me think about the unthinkable and it was not a happy time. My love for him is no less, NO LESS, than anyone else's love for somebody. To suggest otherwise is to tilt at windmills and to delude yourself.

Every time I read another comment like those on here, I'll remember that unlike them I'm on the side of love. And woe betide anyone who thinks they can tell me differently.

I'm here, I'm queer and I'm not going anywhere (unless there's chocolate, in which case I'm yours).

If you feel benevolent and particularly generous, this writer always appreciates things bought for him from his wishlist

Something Like Summmer: Review

As you, Dear Constant Reader, know too well I do not generally read fiction outside of some set criteria: if it's not written by Stephen King/Dean R Koontz or it's not about time travel/freaks of evolution/zombies then generally it's not read.

However whilst Jim was in Boston last week he informed me I simply had to, no excuses allowed, read a book by Jay Bell called Something Like Summer. Given I was in the middle of reading a particularly awesome alternate history novel at the time I was not so keen. But, out of both a trust of Jim's taste and fear of his wrath if I hadn't at least started the book by the time he got home, I decided to give it a go.

The book's story revolves around the life of one gay guy from high school through to twenty-somethingness, from his first crush through marriage and tragedy. The main character, Ben, acts in ways I can barely comprehend, but the story drew me in and I found myself actually empathising with the characters so much that I struggled to read through the embarrassing/dangerous situations Ben got himself into because I find those sorts of situations so terrifying. His on/off romance with Tim is well done, even if I couldn't ever imagine acting the way Ben does at times, with Tim reminding me very much of the character of John Dixon in Get Real.

The mark of a good story is how well it makes you care about the characters and, honestly, by the end of the book there were tears in my eyes which was quite embarrassing as I was sitting at my desk at work! And it did a truly awesome job of capturing those early years in a gay guy's life when he's just coming out and gave me a nice nostalgic glow regarding my own misspent youth.

If you're looking for something that's easy to read, engaging, affordable and touching then this book will tick all those boxes. Check it out!




If you feel benevolent and particularly generous, this writer always appreciates things bought for him from his wishlist

I'm Not Proud To Be Gay: I'm Ecstatic

I may no longer attend pride parades but that doesn't mean I still don't annoy my better half with my constant obsession with all news and affairs which are little bit gay. And I thought it was time to remember why I feel the need to obsess over them... because if I'm not putting my views of things out there then, as sure as summer follows spring, some other gay guy out there will be putting his view across and passing it off as everyone else's.

There are so many self-hating queers out there. Yes I used the q-word, but I think it's far more all encompassing than any other and is far more interesting a word than using "LGBT". I know, I've alienated half my readers already, but that's the other group driving me mad these days "The PC Queers". But I'll get to them in a moment.

Firstly we have the recent Brian Sewell incident where that self-hater, who has described attraction to the same sex as an "affliction", said Coronation Street had gotten "too gay" (4 characters out of 60 regulars is "too gay"?). Of course the Daily Mail loves gay, or in this case bisexual, men who hate. Just look at their love in with Andrew Pierce (see what I've written on him in the past here). These folks are conservative True Believers who will happily join forces with Satan himself if they felt it would advance their political agenda. They've sold themselves out, and would have no trouble selling us all out. This is why I remain ever careful about newly out Tory politicians, like Nigel Evans, because their past actions have shown them for what they truly are... self-haters. Self-hate leads to real hate which leads to the Dark Side. Or something like that.

Which brings us to the other side of the crazy coin. The PC brigade. Once I thought raging against political correctness was something only the Daily Mail reading, tin-foil hat wearing contingent could get away with. But it's becoming ever more obvious that you really CAN'T say what you want to say in this world. From the banning of the word queer in a LGBT grouping at work, to Scotland's latest cunning plan to ban the word homosexual. Worse are those who fought tooth and nail against East End Pride not because the EDL were behind it but because it might upset some fragile community relations (i.e. piss off some homophobes who just happen to share their leftie agenda).

And then on top of that you have actual homophobes and well-meaning leftie "straight allies" (I use this phrase sarcastically as I think I'd get violent if anyone actually used it in real life) who believe I should be nicer to murderers because people used to not be very nice to homosexuals and the two things are, of course, equivalent.

So I say "not in my name". I'm proud to be gay, queer or homosexual. I'm not disgusting or wrong. And I'm not in need of pity or any more sympathy than you'd give to any other neighbour or friend. My sexuality does not shape my political agenda and my political agenda does not shape my sexuality. I'm a free agent and I damn well wish other gay men would stop speaking for me, because they are about as good at it as Stonewall is at fighting for equal rights.

No excuses, no apologies, and no caveats.

If you feel benevolent and particularly generous, this writer always appreciates things bought for him from his wishlist

Prayers For Bobby And My Coming Out Story

Jim just introduced me to the most touching movie. Prayers for Bobby starring Sigourney Weaver is the true story of a boy who kills himself due to his difficulties with his sexuality and about his mother who must face her part in his death and face conflicts with her faith. It had me in tears. It was a wonderful, wonderful movie.

I suppose I forget how lucky I was coming out. Bobby killed himself in 1983, the year I was born, but I know his story isn't unique even in today's America (and I'm sure here in the UK to, thankfully, a much lesser extent). I was born into a family free of religion, if not completely of prejudice, and my coming out was a lot easier than most. I think I was harder on myself than my family.

When I was about 12 I got my hands on my first Bible and consumed it's contents eagerly, finding comfort in faith that I couldn't seem to find in friends thanks mainly to not staying in one place long enough to really make many. Then I turned 14.

It started with George Michael. My paper round meant I usually had a Sun left over each day and I was saving up Page 3 girl pictures. Why? Because I was just not finding girls attractive and was doing my best to force the process. Well one day I opened the Sun to find this picture:

It was during George Michael's trouble with the law in some toilets, and it did far more for me than Page 3 girls ever had. Being a good Christian boy (of my own making) I was mortified. I struggled so much to fight it, thinking and believing that homosexuality was wrong.

And then along came the Sixth Former. At 10.25, 26th February 1998 outside the media studies room in the Harvey Grammar School, he stole my heart in an instant. Within 5 minutes I had accepted my sexuality for the first time. And it felt good.

But my inner turmoil did not cease, it was just now my true nature was in the ascendant and my faith in Jesus was diminishing. It was about that time I became pretty suicidal and wrote a suicide note. I didn't actually attempt suicide, I'd more written it as an exercise in what exactly was making me so unhappy in life. I forgot about it but left it (and my diary) in the bottom of my wardrobe one day. And that is when my Mum found it. This came atop a letter from one of my teachers regarding a piece of coursework and his plans to put me in detention for the holidays received the very same day.

So needless to say that when I came home from school it was to find my Mum and Stepdad sat at the dining room table waiting for me. They told me it was just a phase, that it'd pass, that everything was going to be alright. Well that is what my Mum screamed between tears.

I was terrified of what my life was about to become... but after that evening that sort of talk was never mentioned again. It was like they slept on it and realised they'd overreacted. My sexuality became a non-issue, an anti-climatic end to my official family coming out at 14. My extended family was informed, of course, but that was that. When I started going to gay bars in Canterbury with Stephen, my Mum happily gave me a lift there and back without questioning me. When I brought Stephen home for the first time he was quickly adopted and forced into doing the washing up (a sure sign of acceptance in my family).  When my parents arrived home one day and I walked down the stairs with unruly hair and a black policeman, hardly an eyebrow was raised.

It wasn't a perfect coming out, but it was probably the best one for me... I have to say I thank my lucky stars for my Mum and her acceptance of who I am. It's just such a shame for all the boys and girls out there who grow up like Bobby did, living with enforced shame and hatred. One day I hope no one ever needs to come out, that who you love is no more of an issue than your favourite colour. One day...

Prayers for Bobby: A Mother's Coming to Terms with the Suicide of Her Gay Son (US Amazon)

If you feel benevolent and particularly generous, this writer always appreciates things bought for him from his wishlist

GLBT Action Committee

So today was the second meeting of work's new GLBT action committee, and the first I've been able to attend (not counting Friday's vigil). Ten of us showed up to try and work out what we were actually meant to be doing. It was an interesting group and our decisions (based mainly on the reason for our creation: dissatisfaction among GLBT staff) were pretty damn great. Best part was it was the least PC meeting I've ever been to.

After the meeting we headed down to Hammersmith's gay bar, theHope and Anchor. This is a totally ungentrified, two room pub with plenty of... character. But as I said to some of the others who turned their noses up at first, it's nice to have these sort of pubs still around. Poppy, the overly excited pub dog, was the icing on the cake (although I think you should leave any food items outside as she has no qualms about bringing you down in search of your food items as one member of our group discovered). Not a bad place and a nice evening was had.

This blogger works for nothing but the joy of writing but always appreciates things bought from his wishlist

Trafalgar Square Vigil For Ian Baynham

Whilst I was on holiday in Berlin, the GLBT Network at work was formed. Having put my name down for it, I was invited to our first "event" which was to go as a group to the vigil in Trafalgar Square in honour of the life of the recently murdered Ian Baynham and all other recent victims of hate crime. There was only 4 of us (Stephanie, Paul, Cosimo and I) plus Stephanie's partner, so after gathering ourselves at First Out Cafe, we headed down to Trafalgar Square where a very large crowded had gathered.

Sandi Toksvig led the events with various friends of Ian Baynham, Sue Perkins and many different representatives of organisations including the only politicians, Labour ministers, Chris Bryant and Maria Eagle.

It was deeply moving and the musical tributes by both the Gay Men's Chorus' of various cities and the London Gay Symphony Orchestra were touching. We did our part by distributing candle's (and card to protect one's hands!) around the little part of the crowd we'd found ourselves in.

This blogger works for nothing but the joy of writing but always appreciates things bought from his wishlist

Jeffierce - Thai HUNK!

Today I'm missing Thailand, so I thought I'd bring you a Thai flavoured treat! (Happy Independence Day for my American readers!!)





This blogger works for nothing but the joy of writing but always appreciates things bought from his wishlist

The Gay Pride Posts

Given that it is Pride season, here are my pride posts from throughout the years:

My first pride was 2003 London pride. I was 20. I might have been out on the scene for years but I had somehow missed out on the events of pride. Firstly, from reading the post and knowing what happens in the future, I was a cruel and heartless bitch to Stephen that day. I want to say I was hanging with the wrong crowd but that's no excuse. Sorry Ste!!

Secondly, Gareth was boring. BORING. What did I ever see in him? He wouldn't even join the parade. Plus he spent the whole time perving over Ben, and I don't think we were quite at that point in our relationship yet if you know what I mean.

Ben, Gareth, Me and Jon

Highlights: Ben. He's always a highlight. Tina C. Free porn.

Lowlights: Sitting in Gareth's front room while he and Jon sorted through clothes thinking "What on Earth am I doing with these people??".

Brighton Pride 2003! I'm not going to lie to you. Brighton Pride (at least back then) beats London Pride HANDS DOWN! Oh look... NO GARETH. Boring.

Ben, Jon and the ever lovely Zoe!!

Highlights: Being back in Brighton for the first time since the bad stuff. Being at pride with Ben and Zoe. The glitter (honestly Jon and Zoe spent the next year finding glitter in their cars from Ben!!). The randomness.

Lowlights: NONE. It was fandabbydozzy!

London Pride and the first Big Gay Out 2004

I was in my "BLAH!" stage at this point. If readers think I moan a lot now, they should all read the posts between November 2003 and October 2004. All 5 of them. ;) Rants all of them.

Highlights: Making up for last year with Stephen. Ben. Pete, the EXTREMELY gorgeous boy. Sam Fox on stage. The suicide pact with Pete when McFly came on.

Lowlights: Grumpy Jae. Silly Big Gay Out being very boring. McFly not taking off their clothes and making love on stage which is the only thing that would have saved their act.

Soho Pride 2004: This was frigging weird. I think I dreamt it all. I certainly can't find a blogpost about it. Me, my date (a tiny but sexy black policeman called Alex) met up with Tom (my scary stalker at the time) and hilarity failed to ensue. WEIRD.

Brighton Pride 2004: (August 7th) Erm... I have no blogpost!!! Well here's the lowdown. One Mister Jim FAILED to show up because he had to go to America for work or some such excuse so our first ever meeting was postponed. Met up with Mark from Croydon who I've only actually met a few times but he used to work at the BBC and put messages from me on their sports TV feed at the bottom of the screen (made up ones of course, but he livened up Wimbledon for me!!). It was... very lonely but fun in it's own way. Remember sitting on the very long train journey home thinking life couldn't get much worse. Little did I know good things were just around the corner.

London Pride 2005

Jim's first pride!! It was low key, in a classy and good way.

Highlights: Jim

Lowlights: Not enough bags of free handouts taken. No Ben.

Europride in London 2006


It was a world cup year so Meredith, Sam America and I headed out on a gay adventure taking in football at the old Ku Bar and the pride parade.

Highlights: Half naked footie supporters stumbling into pride events.

Lowlights: Lots of queuing to see boring football to please Sam America. Not gay enough. No Ben. No Jim.

2007 was my first prideless year. Why? Erm... I had better things to do!

London Pride 2008 and my pictures!

Frankie and Christine accompanied me to pride in 2008 and I educated them in the art of blowing rainbow whistles and attaching pink Union flags to railings. And also had to help some pride stewards hold Frankie back from attacking some poor innocent Christian fundamentalists who were telling us we were going to Hell. Good times.



Highlights: Naked men.

Lowlights: Not gay enough. Boris Johnson.

So really... even though I think Pride has gone massively down hill even in the few years I've been going, I really should go this coming Saturday. Just for old times sake.

This blogger works for nothing but the joy of writing but always appreciates things bought from his wishlist

Eurovision: The Retrospective

I hope you, Dear Constant Reader, enjoyed the show last night! Before we put Eurovision to bed for another year, and return to business as usual, it's time for us to look back and see exactly what we thought of the whole affair. Let's begin.

Graham Norton As Commentator

Last year I was pretty happy when Terry Wogan implied he was leaving. His commentary had gone from charming sending up of the contest to deeply cynical and unwarranted attacks upon it.

When Graham Norton was announced as his replacement, I was not totally happy. I imagined his commentary would be little different to the cynical Wogan's. I was wrong. His commentary was decent stuff, funny but not too jaded. Certainly a welcome return to treating the contest as something to smile about rather than cry about.

Well done Mr Norton.

Jade Ewan And Our Entry

So I very reluctantly gave my support to Jade to start off with. I've always said Jade could sing, but the song itself gave me moments for concern. Well, I was wrong. It did us proud yesterday. Jade took us into the top 5 for the first time in 7 years. She has proven that we can score big, as long as we choose the right singer.

Sadly many fans on Twitter last night and even the BBC news report afterwards were rather morose and downbeat about this turn of events. This is absolutely unacceptable. We cannot expect to always win! There's over 40 other Eurovision countries! All we should hope is that we do well and come in to the top tier. Which we did. Aiming to win is not a bad thing but being a poor loser is a very bad thing indeed. Especially when Jade did so well, it's quite unfair to her to dismiss what is in fact a victory as "a creditable performance".

The Winner Is... Norway

Norway are famous for their nil points, but last night their entry took the top spot in a massive landslide. The highest points total ever shows that my opinion was completely not in line with Europe as a whole!

What I thought was a bit of an annoying song, sung by someone I can think of better things to do with than watch on telly, turned out to be the winner of the competition. And who am I to argue with the whole of Europe? :D

The Eastern Question

Feeling somewhat like a lone voice in the wilderness I have been decrying the nonsensical attack upon our Eastern neighbours voting patterns for some time. Thankfully this contest proved (even before the new voting system) that any such concerns were unwarranted (see voting analysis ad nauseum for further evidence!).

The semi final knocked out only a few Western countries whilst those east of the Iron Curtain suffered a decimation. Even last night, with the new voting system, the top two entries were Western and 3 of the top five were. That's despite the fact Western countries are totally outnumbered by former Communist block states. So in your face Terry Wogan and the entire British media establishment.

I'm not saying neighbouring countries don't vote for each other. Ireland and the UK are notorious for it. But that's because of cultural reasons, not political ones, and the only way around it is to do what we did this year: send our entry around Europe, get them on television, and ensure they know we are around. It has paid off handsomely. (If only the BBC had read this blog they'd know I'd been suggesting that for donkey's years! Sending Andy Abraham around UK television studios last year to promote his song was, to be blunt, serving only his future career not the interests of our Eurovision entry)

The Slavic Pride Controversy

I'd be interested to know if any other nations commentators made a mention of the heavy handed tactics of the Moscow police in breaking up a legitimate, if technically illegal, gay pride demonstration. For our part, Graham used a particularly topical comical interval act (just for those of us without adverts!) of singing policeman to mention the one dark mark against the Russian hosting of the contest. It was very little, and I would have preferred more, but at least he got it out there.

The British Response

Does anyone actually like Eurovision in this country anymore? Listening to the semi final commentary from Paddy, the emails he received and our response to Jade's awesome achievement suggest not. All have been lacking any decency, respect or even amusement. Dark and cynical is the best way to describe it. Paddy obviously HATES the competition and the people whose communications were read out seemed to hate it too (why they bothered to watch or write in I don't know!!). Does anyone in this country ever smile? Perhaps we deserve to be broken up, cut off from Europe and made an international pariah. We certainly seem to lack any sense of joy, hope or any positive emotions as a people.

Well I resolutely shall not succumb to this idiocy nor negativity. Jade did it! She might not have won but she brought Eurovision glory back into sight. And the quality of the other entries was at an all time high. 2009 was, possibly, the best Eurovision contest of the decade!

See you here, this time next year. But if you can't wait that long... Asiavision starts selecting in July followed by the first ever Asia-Pacific Song Contest in November! COME ON THAILAND!!!!

This blogger works for nothing but the joy of writing but always appreciates things bought from his wishlist

The 54th Eurovision Song Contest Final In Moscow - Live Blog

Official Sites: Eurovision, BBC Eurovision. ESCToday

Other Live Blogs: The Guardian, Bill Cameron

Welcome to Eurovision 2009! Not without it's controversies such as the on again/off again Georgian entry and today's abuse of homosexual activists in Moscow. Whilst I suspect acknowledgment of the Russian invasion of Georgia last year is a little too much to ask for, a mention of today's events would be very welcome indeed.

There's a rather Western European theme tonight as our entries have done comparatively well considering we are vastly out numbered by countries from the East of the old Iron Curtain in the competition as a whole. Of course you won't hear that on the news, as everyone is soooo obsessed with Eastern domination.

Not only is there a change in voting (details plus all artists videos here) but also a rather huge change for us Brits. Terry Wogan has, thankfully, passed his commentating jacket on to a new generation (after last years contest I think it was the best decision for all involved). Graham Norton will be leading the proceedings tonight, and it will be interesting to see how he performs, although those who hope for him to actually like Eurovision might be asking too much.

Anyway... Good luck to Jade!!! Here we go...

20:01 Graham sounds rather reserved, in a good way. Your usual show opening, all costumes and dancing.

20:04 Very impressive Cirque Du Soleil

20:06 Dima looks as cute as ever!! But lip synching? TUT!

20:08 Wow, that was the worst returning performance I've ever seen on Eurovision!

20:10 Thank God. It's not the semi final presenters. Fingers crossed Dimitry still about though!

20:11 Graham, stop talking over the presenters!!!!

Lithuania

"Love" - Sasha Son

I wasn't a big fan of thise last night. He looks very smart, and sings well. But the song is a bit too "Blue" esqe (the band that is!). But a nifty performance nevertheless.

Israel

"There Must Be Another Way" - Noa and Mira Awad

As I said the other day, it's the first Israeli entry I'm not dismissing outright for political reasons. (Yeah, I encourage political voting!). The message is good. The song is good. But the singing is really average. Almost good kareoke rather than of the high standard I'd expect.

France

"Et s'il fallait le faire" - Patricia Kaas

It's the first of the Big 4. Very good. Amazing singing, good song. And it was in French. Always good. Liked it alot.

Sweden

"La voix" Malena Ernman

Viewing this afresh tonight, it is actually rather good isn't it? Liked it.

Croatia

"Lijepa Tena" - Igor Cukrov feat. Andrea

Yeah, it's alright. But I don't really like it myself.

Portugal

"Todas as ruas do amor" - Flor-de-Lis

Very good. Very summery and upbeat.

Iceland

"Is It True?" - Yohanna

Good song, good singer, should do well. IS IT TRUE??? But Iceland really don't want to win... how would they afford it?!

Greece

"This is our night" - Sakis Rouvas

There were nipples. There was dancing. There was Sakis, Mr Eurovision himself. Gotta be in the top ten for me.

Armenia

"Jan Jan" - Inga and Anush

I don't know. I thought I was in a very forgiving mood for the semi finals, but on second viewing I am even more ready to like these songs. Brilliant song, singing not so much but the outfits and the dancing almost made up for that deficiency.

Russia

"Mamo" - Anastasiya Prikhodko

After what happened in Moscow today, I think we should all do raspberries through this song. And it's not brilliant either.

Azerbaijan

"Always" - AySel and Arash

Again more forgiving. Liked this a lot tonight, very Eurovision. Maybe it's because most of my favourite are gone and I'm very these with less prejudice than before.

Bosnia and Herzegovina

"Bistra Voda" - Regina

Good singing, but the song is soooo boring.

We are not treated to Dimitry during the break, instead a "light hearted" look at singing policeman which allowed Graham to mention the pride incident! In your face Russia!

Moldova

"Hora din Moldova" - Nelly Ciobanu

Fun song, with Steve's favourite dancers, but difficult to sing along to. Not that I tried... ;)

Malta

"What If We" - Chiara

Oh here she is again... 3rd time lucky! I actually really love this song, and not just because Malta have always been generous with their votes to the UK. She can certainly sing, and this song shows that off.

Love you Malta!

Estonia

"Rändajad" - Urban Symphony

Another great song, another good performance. Not going to get my vote but I'll be listening to it again.

Denmark

"Believe Again" - Niels Brinck

Too much of Ronan Keating in this song. The sound, the lyrics, all too Ronan for me.

Germany

"Miss Kiss Kiss Bang" - Alex Swings Oscar Sings!

Love the song. Really very good. Shame about the glittery trousers...

Turkey

"Düm Tek Tek" - Hadise

My favourite all along. Sadly the singing here let it down... big time... :(

Albania

"Carry Me In Your Dreams" - Kejsi Tola

I do like this song. Very good... Graham and Twitterers seem really down on this... I don't know why.

Norway

"Fairytale" - Alexander Rybak

Hmm... it's a bit annoying this song. But then I just imagine Alexander and myself in an orchard frolicing naked and all is forgiven. Sorry for the images there Dear Constant Reader.

I wish someone had told him this was not a speaking contest.

Ukraine

"Be My Valentine! (Anti-Crisis Girl)" - Svetlana Loboda

It's crazy. It's the Ukraine! What does one expect? Men in silver Roman centurion outfits, crazy set, brilliant chorus. I like it in a "I wouldn't vote for it in a million years" sort of way.

Romania

"The Balkan Girls" - Elena

Hmm.. good song but the dodgy singing arrangements left me cold.

United Kingdom

"It's My Time" - Jade Ewan

It's my country. Not my choice of song, but Jade is, as always, amazing. Did the Lord need to be there? He looked a mess and made us look tacky! Might as well have had me up on the stage.

Finland

"Lose Control" - Waldo's People

Jesus, did I have some happy juice today? At the semi final I decried this as "eurorap" but loved it this evening!

Spain

"La noche es para mí" - Soraya Arnelas

Hmm... not as good as in the video. The singing let it down BUT vast improvement on last few Spanish entries.

Voting

I'll be voting for Malta who have snuck past Turkey to steal my affections. Esctoday have their top ten as:

1. Norway
2. Turkey
3. Greece
4. Azerbaijan
5. Iceland
6. Bosnia & Herzegovina
7. United Kingdom
8. Ukraine
9. France
10. Estonia

It'll be interesting to see how that pans out.

This year, as a seasoned Eurovision viewer, I have been totally shocked by the high quality of songs this year. Going to be difficult to call, especially with the new voting.

That was the most crazy interval act ever!! Swimming pools in the sky.

Here we go...

Spain gives us 10 points!!!!! We love you Spain!!!
No points for us from Belgium (BOOO)
Belarus gives us 3 points! WOOOO...
Malta gives us 10 points!!! WOOOOOO... best showing for ages!
Germany gives us 8 points! YAYYYY!
The Czech Republic gives us 6 points!!! Love to Prague!
Sweden. No more love for you!
Iceland... grr.. the Scandanavians.
France gives us 4 points.. :D
Israel gives us 4 points. Send them some weapons!!!
Russia gives us 6 points but they are not forgiven!!!
Latvia gives us 2. Who would have thought this could be though of as an insult???? We would have loved 2 points this time last year.
Montenegro shock everyone. Or not. No points.
Andorra gives us 4 points! YAY!
Finland. Nada.
Switzerland. Nada. Off the Christmas list.
Bulgaria. 7 points. We love Sofia.
Lithuania give us 3 points. :D
We give 12 points to Turkey woooo...
Macedonia give us 6 points. Wooo..

I'm stopping this, as really Jade has already done us proud!!!!!! :D See you at the end of voting.

Norway won by a landslide, but that was a sure thing. We came 5th!!!! We are back Europe!! WOOOOO....

see you tomorrow for my thoughts on the winner, Graham and Jade!

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Moscow Police Break Up Gay Pride March

The Slavic Pride march has been broken up by the Moscow police and Peter Tatchell has been arrested.

Given the fact this is a blatant attack upon human freedom, it seems almost perverse to question how this might affect the Eurovision Song Contest. But it shall certainly make for an interesting wild card in tonights final. Will any artist have the balls to make a stand, or will Eurovision pass off without incident?

Only time will tell, let us just hope that those arrested are being treated decently and are freed soon. Write in to your EBU television station and ask for their reaction!!

This blogger works for nothing but the joy of writing but always appreciates things bought from his wishlist

The Apprentice Does Kent

Yes! Our most beloved reality tv show has gone to my beloved home county of Kent. Not just any part of Kent but Planet Thanet itself! Margate was the destination of choice in this rebranding exercise.

While one team took the family approach (Ben thought to rebrand Margate with the slogan "the epitomy of English beauty", this was despite actually having visited it!), the other decided to rebrand one of the most deprived areas of the country as a "gay destination". Erm... okay... that's a bit random. I think team member Howard might think aiming for the pink pound is always the solution to any business problem.

Anyway, who most successfully rebranded Margate? The town officials who organised this, when did one hear about anything in Thanet quite this much? They need a raise!

This blogger works for nothing but the joy of writing but always appreciates things bought from his wishlist

Eurovision and Moscow Pride

Steve reminded me the other day of an issue I'd first worried about months ago and promptly forgot. Eurovision is being held in Moscow on the same day as the, ever controversial, Moscow Pride.

Peter Tatchell at Moscow Pride 2007

Russian Nationalists and Russian's Orthodox brand of woowoo are certainly not planning on letting Pride pass peacefully. The Mayor of Moscow has made clear his position before. He thinks it's a "satanic" parade, and one that is thus banned in Moscow.

So we face the prospect of people being injured and attacked just for their sexuality, mere moments before the Eurovision final which will be the centre of focus of people across the world.

Given the corruption and backwardness of the Russian security forces these days, and the fact this parade is going on against the Mayor's wishes, attendees can expect no protection from the violence that has characterised this parade in the past.

But that will not stop it. When has violence against homosexuals ever stopped the onwards movement of our equal rights? You may throw stones. You may kill us. But it only makes us more determined to fight for our right to exist as we wish. Peter Tatchell obviously puts the case more eloquently and forcefully here. Good luck to him and all who attend.

So will this affect Eurovision? Probably not. Eurovision organisers are notoriously blind to political matters (which perhaps is a good stance for a music contest!!).

A question was asked about the Dutch parliament discussing eventual withdrawal from the contest if the Russian officials would use violence to stop the planned gay pride parade in Moscow on Saturday. This was addressed by Mr. Stockselius by stating that the Eurovision Song Contest is a non-political TV entertainment show and while politicians could discuss issues like withdrawal it was still always down to the broadcasters to decide. He said the Eurovision Song Contest rules stated that if a country would not rehearse or perform according to a planned schedule it could be sanctioned by a fine and up to a three years’ ban. He also said that every year some countries threaten to withdraw but none have so far. Esctoday

The Toppers, the Netherlands entry, have vowed that, should they make the final, they will boycott it if violence is used against gay protesters.

"If people of my kind are being discriminated against in such a way, I have nothing to expect from this Russia, and I will be on the first plane home."

Is Russia really willing to let something like that occur? Imagine every Eurovision commentator noting the absence, and reason for such, live on air during the performances. Is Russia prepared to help ruin it's hosting of Eurovision? Hmm... Moscow, the eyes of Europe are watching...

This blogger works for nothing but the joy of writing but always appreciates things bought from his wishlist

Xisco Isn't Even Gay

Queerty, and a couple of other sources, report that Francisco Jiménez Tejada is gay. This seems to be based mainly on lots of pictures of him kissing guys.

Personally I don't get a gay vibe from him. These pics just seem to be your bog standard pictures, which can be found across Europe even here in Britain, of drunk straight guys.

If he is gay, then my gaydar has stopped working and I need to get a new one.

This blogger works for nothing but the joy of writing but always appreciates things bought from his wishlist

Things That Are Good

1) Ajoo from South Korea. Yoinked from Gay Boy Thailand.

2) Currywurst. There is a wonderful German sausage stall in Lewisham town centre and Jim introduced me to this tasty German treat. YUM! Really am liking Germany more and more every day. Maybe this is because I've been reading the Spiegel's International Edition for news recently. I find reading the papers from the continent really interesting as it gives you a different perspective on all the stories of the day.

3) Understanding the irony of a protest in support of Palestine using the Rainbow flag, as seen in Lewisham. I'm all for Palestinian rights but let's remember being a gay Palestinian is a fate none would envy. I understand the Rainbow flag is also the Peace flag but still...

4) Death Note: The Last Name was really very good.

This blogger works for nothing but the joy of writing but always appreciates things bought from his wishlist

Movie Weekend!

I've watched a few movies this weekend, in an effort to save money and also to allow Jim some relaxation as he currently has a poorly hand (jokes on a postcard). Some old, some new.

I saw Milk. Given we already have the Oscar Award winning "The Times of Harvey Milk", this movie had to do one of two things for me to like it;

1) give us more insight into some of the personalities involved than given by the aforementioned documentary
2) give us a reflection of our own times through the prism of these past events.

It did neither. The Times of Harvey Milk gave me far more of a feeling for who Harvey Milk and Dan White were as people than this movie did. And rather than being a reflection upon LGBT rights today it seemed to be little more than a nostalgic, rose tinted looked at the heady pre-AIDS LGBT movement of the 70s. And, as a comment on this article suggests, all at the expense of everyone else involved and gives Harvey Milk all the credit (not that he didn't deserve a lot of credit for what he did, but let's not make him out to be a superhero, when he was just a good guy).

Really, what was the point of this movie? It wasn't entertaining, and it was no more educational than a 25 year old documentary. I must have missed the point.

I also saw Death Note which was entertaining and, based on my limited experience of Japanese movies (read Godzilla films and The Ring cash ins), was different to the usual. Liked it, a lot, and not just because Tatsuya Fujiwara is a hottie.



Classic movies watched include the awesome "Crimson Tide" and "King Kong Vs. Godzilla", not so awesome but a lot better than most 60s sci fi movies.

Oh and I want this house. How frigging call would that place be?

This blogger works for nothing but the joy of writing but always appreciates things bought from his wishlist

Oh Yes, It's My Gayaversary!

11 years ago. I'm getting old.

Of course I've been gay all my life, I know that and knew that even in '98. But accepting I was gay, that was a bit more difficult. Well it was until I got the hots for someone!

I won't lie, when I was a teenager I used to wish I wasn't gay. Not because I wanted to get married or lead a "normal" life. But because I didn't want the hassle. And I'm not talking about homophobia. Being gay just makes interactions all a little more tricky.

But being gay is something I love and wouldn't give up now for anything. I love men. I like the different perspective being gay gives me on the world. Being straight would mean a life without Jim, my best friend as well as my boyfriend. That would be truly awful.

I sometimes wonder what straight Jae would be like. Perhaps he is out there, in some other dimension. Wouldn't it be interesting to meet him? Nah... he'd probably vote Tory.

From Dolph Lundgren



Through to Spartan.



Men. Love 'em.

This blogger works for nothing but the joy of writing but always appreciates things bought from his wishlist